Story: Love Me Again

    Written by: Loudest Thoughts
    NB:No part of this story should be reproduced
    “Time is Everything in Marriage”


    Gosh its 6: 00 Am already, I stretched my arms towards my alarm and managed to say; D--n it Babs why didn’t you wake me up, I asked my sleepy wife struggling to get out of her sleep. I ignored her and quickly rushed to the washroom, within some few minutes I was out of there and on my way out with my briefcase and my car keys. Darling am sorry but breakfast would be ready in 5minutes, I ignored her once more and off I drove away. I felt guilty treating her as such this morning but am beginning to think she’s getting too lazy lately, at least that was the only way I could defend my actions towards her lately.

    “Feelings of the first day is like buying a new something you can’t do without”

    My wife Barbara and I got married two years ago in a small congregation in San Francisco where I met her during one of my business trips. With all the nice stories about how couples meet, ours was different. A very awkward one for that matter. After business one evening, I decided to go out for a walk, along the way, I felt the urge to urinate, as I entered I met this African lady in the males washroom who didn’t even notice I entered, her door was left ajar, I quickly took out my phone and on the shutter sound of the camera, she came out of her absent mindness forgetting she was yet to pull up her “pant”. There the fuss begun, she threatened to kill me if I do not delete the picture, I also threatened to put it on social media. She got furious and we started exchanging words in the washroom. I couldn’t tell why I was pissed but then I convinced myself probably because she was at the wrong place which of course didn’t make sense as to why I should make a big deal of it. For some couple of minutes, someone else entered and we pretended we were fine. Until I heard the guy say; gosh get a room. Barbara stared at me and for a second I saw something else in her eyes. She walked out and I followed forgetting what I came to do. I said please wait, she kept walking and I kept closing the distance, until she got to what seemed like her car, about to open and I shouted don’t you want your picture anymore. Then I thought I caught her attention but she looked back and said keep it for all I care. She got into her car and tried driving off which I nearly got hit because I was standing in her drive way. I could see her fuming in the car and finally got out, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT, and I replied I think I like you, at least let me apologize for what happened back there. Okay fine, can you get out of my way now she said. I got out of her way instantly having mixed feelings.


    “when you feel its’ right go get it”

    A week after, I met Barbara on my hotel corridor. I actually went to see a business partner at that particular hotel, I instantly forgot what I came to do even though it will cause me the main reason of my trip I quickly rushed to her because since our encounter I have been longing to see her again, I don’t know why but that day I had goose bumps all over me. That does not really explain my eagerness to see her again, but I know I like her
    This time around she was not so tensed but smiled to my greetings. Hey you again, yes me again I said and reached out for a handshake, we talked and she told me she was on her way out and gave me her room number. After she left, I told myself that was easy. In the evening I went to the reception to put a call through to her, she gave the go ahead to see her. I knocked on her door and she came out, OH you are the Clyde guy. I nodded my head simply because I was dumbfounded of the beauty staring me in the eyes. I was jolted out of my reverie when she said come in. I was nervous but then the night went well, until I realized I was extending my stay in San Francisco because of Barbara. We became best friends and later got to know when we met in the urinal she was angry with her dad who was bent on marrying her off to another family friend. She sounded like her Dad was so fearful, well families that have money to book a hotel for a whole year must be so rich and powerful, I thought Barbara is a beauty to behold, it took me some time to win her heart, close to a year, among all the closures, the sex, romance, stories, fights and when the parents had to leave her life for her because she didn’t want to go back to them in London. Though I travelled from Nigeria to San Francisco for business, I found love, so I went back home and came back with some of my family to marry her. Since the Dad Mr. Wilson was bent on marrying her to another they did not honor our invitation to the wedding. Barbara left home and was staying in San Francisco for close to a year so she made some few friends that made it easy getting married. She was contemplating on going back until she met love and since then we got back to Nigeria.


    “A little patience to listen and understand why things happen won’t kill you”


    I was in my office after storming out of the house without breakfast when my secretary rang me,
    my wife was around, before I could say let her in, Barbara was already in my office with a sad face and lunch box. Clyde am sorry it happened again, but I brought you lunch. I asked her to leave it on the table and I was on my way out leaving her in my office confused
    When she asked where I was going as if she is my boss
    Am sure she didn’t see how I looked at her, because she was still expecting an answer I responded in a very sarcastic manner; this is a working environment not a kitchen or a restaurant, if you don’t mind I have a meeting to attend, don’t wait up for me, I might be late. I walked out without turning back. I must admit in the past, Babs brings me food and I never complained, but today I did. We have never had big arguments which would lead to me being rude as I did today but am guessing its just about the food.


    “After spending an eternity with that someone, there would still be the little stuffs you would need to learn about them over time”

    This is how it has been after about 3years of us living together, I suddenly get offended over every little thing i used to laugh at when we were still newbies in our marriage, and I couldn’t help but conclude after 2years of tieing the knot, I out grew those feelings I had. Barbara and I dated for a year and got married in our second year and after the second year, I realized the love is replaced by hatred. So basically 3years of living together, I now think we weren’t meant to love each other. I didn’t think marriage was this much a baggage, you think you know someone well enough to spend your whole life with, but then there are little things you might get to adjust to later
    Later in the evening, while driving back home I kept asking myself why I am so furious over just a little thing.
    Was it because it’s becoming a pattern or because I felt she was never like that and might become a problem when we finally start having kids. Yes! Kids, we’ve been trying since we got married.
    We planned on adopting but wanted to give it a little time. By the time I realized I was home, instantly greeted by my wife. Darling welcome, how was your day.
    I replied fine. She quickly dropped my suit and bag. Rushed to the kitchen to get the dinner table laid whiles I sat there watching TV. Darling food is ready. She knows I like to eat before taking my bath.
    We sat to eat and just for her to keep starring at her food.
    I ignored once more, and rushed down to the washroom to throw up Barbara what is that! I fumed, she came rushing to the room.
    Clyde what is it, are you okay Are you asking me? Ask the food you cooked.
    Clyde am sorry, I just…. You just what huh I dashed out and luckily I was still in my work attire, I took my car keys and left. I went to a restaurant closer to our house and ordered eba and agushie stew, as I was eating I thought to myself; Barbara is a good cook, never has she cooked such a food for me. Though I would admit we’ve been having some issues for the past year regarding our feelings for each other, where we barely talked anymore, she knows I don’t joke with my food. I can’t remember the last time I touched my wife, though she always seemed not to be bothered, I just prayed it wouldn’t come to the time where I had to resort eating outside or beating her up.
    But today it has! Well she might have been tired or something is bothering her. I saw her stare at the food during dinner.
    She gets that way when she has something bothering her. At least I know her to that extent. And I always end up being the one to find out everytiime. I hope she is feeling okay, I asked myself, Aaah Clyde what do you even care.
    Yes what do I care, but then it got to a point I get worried when she’s not looking cheerful I hurriedly ate and drove home, I saw Barbara sleeping on the couch There and then I knew she was hurting, old feelings came rushing back in I quickly remembered when we were in love and decided to get married What happened for me to suddenly feel am falling out of love with my wife. I carried her upstairs, one thing about Babs is she is cute and easy to carry, While on the way she clinched to my shoulder and slept off I was awoke half of the night starring at her while she slept peacefully beside me. I felt some adrenaline rushing through my body while I runned my hand through her silky hair that once our happy days makes me droll all over her. I then cast my mind back to what once was love now hatred.


    *“Trust is like a pencil, when the edge gets broken, you can sharpen it to a point, but once it gets to the extreme where there is nothing left to sharpen; you lose everything or you tell yourself I got to keep trusting”*

    I remember I came home one evening and I yelled!
    Me: Babs where were you today Babs: Darling I have been home doing your laundry all day Me: Are you lieing to me right now
    Babs: For Christ’s sake Clyde, have I ever lied to you? And where is this coming from
    Me: I saw you at Mr. Biggs today with Dr. Livie, your gynecologist. Me: how many times have I warned you not to see him again, not as a friend or your gynaeo?
    Me: Answer me Babs, Come here! I dragged Barbara by her hair to my face
    Babs: Clyde you are hurting me, besides I already told you I was not out today, neither do I have anything doing with Livie. Ask Mrs Ibe nextdoor, she was doing laundry outside as well
    Me: Oh you guys are now on an informal name basis
    Babs: You are reacting for no reason, call Livie and ask him when was the last time he saw me and Clyde what point of I love you and you are my husband so I see no other man do you not understand. Every day you seem to have all sort of allegations about Livie and me, to the point of changing my number. What’s wrong with you? Is this what I travelled so many miles for? Am pretty sure this is not only about Livie anymore. Until you are ready to tell me what it is about, I will be waiting but for now do what pleases you. I am fully aware, am still so much in love with my husband, his grunts, and sense of jealousy these days I must admit make me feel I am losing him slowly but I also knew I have to let it be. Time will reveal and heal everything
    Me: Are you talking to me like that. We exchanged words for a while and I ended up not eating that evening and I took over the guest room for a week.


    “Egos are deal breakers, don’t carry them with you everywhere”

    In the second week, i heard a knock on my door in the middle of the night and it was Barbara
    Babs: Clyde please open the door
    Me: What do you want, am not in the mood for s*x. We can talk in the morning.
    Babs: Look am sorry about what happened out there last week, I shouldn’t have spoken to you that way.
    And I want you to know I love you so much and if I had to cut off my male friends because of you I will. Besides I did the last time you saw us over a friendly dinner, just to save my marriage. That was the last i saw or heard of Livie, so whoever you saw with him recently wasn’t me.
    I kept quiet for a long time and since I wasn’t hearing her voice anymore i assumed she had left.
    I made it a point to avoid her that morning like i have been doing for the past week, hence skipping breakfast
    From then, we were always at each other’s throat, well basically I was always at her throat. I do eat what she cooks, but we barely communicated.
    I then decided to move back in our bedroom when my mum informed me she was coming over but couldn’t make it
    I know my mum wouldn’t hesitate to take my side when she comes
    My mum, Mrs Obi is the best mum ever, not because she takes my side but even as the only son she knows how and when to rebuke me


    “Appreciate even the worse character of your partner, don’t try to change it you might lose them, its better you point it out sometimes”

    It was Saturday so I knew she might oversleep like she does these days, but was surprised to wake up and Barbara was not beside me, i thought I was watching over her when I carried her in last night, Did I sleep off, how?
    I asked myself I walked down to the sitting room and looked all over and there was no sign of my wife, My eyes caught food on the table, then I remembered yesterday’s experience, I decided to ignore I went to meet Ibweke my gateman and asked the whereabouts of my wife, he said she saw her going out
    Her car was parked in the garage, Close to an hour she entered, the room
    Babs: Good morning I hope you saw your food
    Me: Yeah, but I didn’t touch it, you can eat yourself
    Babs: sorry about last night, today is better, should I come feed you Darl…
    Me: I quickly cut her off before she could finish, Babs I need no drama this early morning
    Babs: sorry, she walked away in what seems like tears I wished I could console her, but that hatred part of me was holding me back. The day was uneventful, Babs was in doors throughout until I heard a knock on my door while I was trying to take a nap in the sitting room. I opened just to see who it was then my demeanor changed
    Dr Livie: Hello Clyde
    Me: I stood at the door for some time and he asked aren’t you going to let me in,
    Then I heard my wife’s footstep coming down I stepped aside for him to enter and gave a fake smile
    Then my wife came down to meet us, he made way to go hug Babs, And I interrupted saying come on let’s sit here,
    Babs see to our guest. He followed me to the sitting area, we exchanged pleasantries Babs brought him water and a drink, I gave her a look that would have given her a heart attack if not for the fact that she understood me She sat down beside me, then I asked her to get me a drink myself Just to avoid her seeing Livie
    Me: what brings you here today, been a while
    Dr Livie: Can’t I visit my friends and my patient anymore
    Me: yes you can, that was sarcastic, I meant is everything okay since you’ve never been to our house before. How did you even know our house address. Hope it wasn’t difficult to locate.
    I asked just to satisfy my own curiosity
    Dr Livie: Oh how! I have been here on two occasions, but always met your absence. It seems I always come at the wrong time.
    But then, haven’t seen you guys in a while, Barbara hasn’t been to any of her appointments and she keeps ignoring my calls. Wanted to find out if everything is alright
    Just when he mentioned why he was there,
    Babs came in with the drink and made a gesture to talk but I interrupted
    Me: emmmmmmm, we are around just that…….. I was cut short by Barbara
    I was so furious within me when I heard he was here in my absence,
    Then I kept playing some drama’s in my head, what could they have done. OMG!!! Babs you have killed me, I thought
    Babs: I travelled somewhere with my husband for some time,I did see your calls and I definitely planned on returning them, but then wanted to do that when I get back I was impressed what a perfect lie my wife has told, I wasn’t sure if Dr. Livie believed but he left after some few minutes on an emergency call he had.
    Then I became worried, does he have my wife’s new number, When did he call, was it after or before I changed her line? Immediately he left, I saw him to his car, when I got back, I saw Barbara waiting with folded arms behind the door


    “Good communication,not just any communication”

    Babs: she shove me an eye, are you satisfied now, If you are can we go back to those times of no fighting? I would really love to be at peace with you
    Me: so you can lie perfectly like this, what shows you haven’t been lieing all along?
    I kept the part when he mentioned he visited on two occasions to myself,
    Because I wanted to investigate first
    Babs: What do you mean Clyde?
    Me:I mean you managed to fool Dr. Livie,
    What shows everything you have been telling me all this while is true? Babs: Whatever
    Me:Babs did you just say whatever
    Babs: yes I did, am so tired of this emotional trauma, I mean why am I even still with you if you think I have anything doing with Livie? It doesn’t work that way, am still here because for “better for worse” And she tried to walk away, then I shouted on top of my voice, come back here
    Babs:And if I don’t what will you do I was so furious to the extent that I grabbed her by the arm and pulled her towards with the intention to give her the slap of her life, she tripped and fell on her ankle.
    Babs fell on the floor once again and groaned.
    Selfishly and heartlessly I left her there and walked out of the house. I heard her say Clyde you are heartless. I made up my mind while driving out am leaving my matrimonial bed this time for good, Can’t imagine what my wife had done with Livie in my own house.


    “Not every man in your wife’s life is interested in her; some are genuine friends when they know their stand so don’t open that door”

    I tried crawling to the home phone table just to put a call through to someone, The one person that came to mind, I dialed the number.
    Yes I have his number off head
    Babs: Livie, Please its Barby, knowing very well he doesn’t know our fixed line number, I then said could you please help me, amidst tears I told him I fell down and I think I can’t move
    Dr Livie: What, How, don’t worry am turning round, whatever you do don’t risk walking about until I take a look at it
    Babs: Thank you, he kept calling to check in until he got here While still on the floor, I thought about what has gotten over Clyde lately, at first I could just enjoy the silence treatments but now he is becoming violent, then I heard a knock on my door
    Babs: come in Livie
    Dr Livie: Oooh Barby, it looks serious He said while rushing to my end, he sat beside me on the floor with his first aid box. While checking my leg out and finally deciding what to do to relieve the pain, he kept asking questions
    Dr Livie:Are you sure you just fell, because the magnitude of the fracture is saying something else.
    Are you sure you were not pushed.
    By the way where is Clyde? Why is he not here? Shouldn’t he be your first call? Are you sure he wasn’t the one who did this to you.
    Babs:Livie, please I don’t need you to be inquisitive right now, I am not on one of those your examination tables to be questioned Tell me can I walk again, is it that bad.
    Dr. Livie:Yes you can walk, but I need to take you to the hospital for an x-ray considering the fact that you can’t walk now
    You know am a gynecologist, not that kind of doctor to give you all the answers you need
    Babs:I understand this isn’t your field, but I called you anyway, Knowing very well you might know a thing or two
    Can’t you do anything for now to relieve the pain? Whiles I look into the hospital tomorrow if it gets worse? And by the way, my husband didn’t do this, He went out not long ago and his phone is not reachable, that’s how come you are here now, Besides you are the only doctor friend I happen to have his number lying around
    Dr Livie: Really am your friend? You seem to have given me another impression lately, especially earlier when I visited. I doubted that act you put on there. Well-done Barby
    Babs: Livie, I don’t know what you are talking about, But then do you think I need this blame games right now. Please help me to my room.

    EPISODE 10

    “Manage your anger when you are around a woman, so you don’t ruin your chance with her”

    Within some few minutes I was in my room, Livie gave me some medicines and I told him I was going to sleep, so he left. Minutes to hours, I heard Clyde on top of his voice, so Barbara you went to report me to your lover
    You even had the guts to bring him in here again. How dare you. I heard him walking inside, I managed to raise up myself Clyde, why are you shouting on top of your voice with my name again? Yes, Livie came here to do what you couldn’t do, what’s the big deal about that You pushed me down and left me to die, is that what you have reduced this marriage to
    And how dare you call me a cheat. Clyde be careful with your words, silent treatment I can take but not violence
    For some time he was silent when I spoke up, I kept wondering why then he flared up
    Clyde: Oh really, you haven’t seen anything yet,
    Me: my dear, I have seen everything, what else is there…. May be you finally kill or divorce me He slammed the door while I took a deep breath and relaxed in my bed. I heard his car moving out. The pain seem to have subsided a little so I called Livie, this time with my new line
    Dr Livie: Hello, who is this? Hey Barby is that you,
    How are you using a different line but then I hope everything is fine
    Me: Yes thank you, emmmmmmm did you call Clyde about my fall
    Dr. Livie: yes, has he come yet. He said he was already on his way
    Me: Yes he came home not long after you left We talked for a while and I hanged up. The subsequent days were hectic, I could barely walk on my legs but had to go about cleaning and cooking, Which Clyde shows no interest in these days? One evening, our friends came to visit us
    Let me tell you a little about our friends; Mr. Oke is a Lawyer and Mrs Oke is a counsellor we met at a conference when I moved to Nigerian with Clyde.
    They have been out of the country for some time now. With them, we share our secrets and every other things close friends do I was with them in the sitting room, We talked about life down to my limping leg, and then Clyde came back from work
    Mr.and Mrs:Hey, Man of the House,surprise,
    Clyde: when we spoke I didn’t know you were coming down They talked for a while and for the first time after our fight, Clyde asked if I have offered our guest something I replied and he smiled sheepishly to his guests. Asking them if they are okay
    They engaged in their normal chats and arguments i find time to cut in when I can focusing on my phone. When we meet the Oke’s, we can’t stop talking, arguing about issues. Mrs Oke suddenly asked; are you okay Barbara, You look out of this world, then her husband chorused yes you don’t look yourself I replied just a little malaria, we talked about it and made funny jokes I excused myself and stood up limping on my leg, Mr. Oke asked if I got the leg checked by a doctor since it has been a while and I still feel pain Before I could open my mouth, my husband responded;yes a doctor has seen her I turned and walked away, asking myself what just happened, I brushed it aside. I wasn’t afraid of going to the hospital myself But I don’t want the doctors asking too much questions
    And then there is my husband who may get into trouble.
    I can’t tell if it works that way in Nigeria but it sure does where I came from
    They finally left, and as usual my husband went to his guest room as he has moved there since our last argument. Heartless being I thought He now keeps late night and comes home when he wants to, I can’t tell if he works overnight, am just not bothered with the overnights
    But when he comes home looking funny I keep cooking and he never touches, I make sure I cook little just in case he doesn’t eat Then I can eat myself not to waste the food.

    EPISODE 11

    “When you make your mother in-law your best friend, your household will always be a happy one”

    It was mother’s day and I called Clyde’s mum
    Maa: Hello my daughter, so nice to hear your voice, so if Clyde doesn’t call for me to talk with you, you wouldn’t call me Clyde always does the calling and I speak with her. Me: Maa it’s not that way, being meaning to call but you know I want to do that on a special day like this Happy mother’s day,

    Maa:Thank you my dear, how is everyone, have you heard from your parents since……. Since the wedding I have cut contact with my parents
    Me:No Maa, I will find courage to call them soon. We spoke for a while and I hanged up, And she asked if am cooking home meal for her son which I replied sarcastically; Who wouldn’t want to do that for the love of their life?
    After the call I thought about the food part and I wondered if he had told his mum anything I know she will take the sons side but then I will give her the benefit of the doubt if it turns out she knows But I doubt she does, since she hasn’t asked me,
    She’s one of those mothers who would do anything for their son, So you better not step on her toes or do anything to his son when he is around. I remember, she came on one of those visits with her husband when we were still married and enjoying our marriage when I sheepishly told the son I was tired so we should eat out today, Which he agreed to, which was also a way of hanging out with the family then I thought When she heard me say that, she flared up, is that how I treat his son in this house It took a lot of work by my father in law and Clyde to calm her down which i spent a whole week to apologize for before they left the 3rd week. Since then we became good friends, whenever she visits, I know she likes home meal
    I sat wondering what if I call home for once I picked the phone and dropped it, then for the third time it went through
    Me: hel……….I went mute suddenly on the call
    Mum: hello, who is there, Hello this is Mrs Wilson
    Me: I know this voice like my own blood. That’s our slogan anytime we are playing tricks with our voices with my cousins
    Mum: Barbara is that really you… Oh goodness, how are you calling me now, What happened, are you okay?
    Me: Mum relax, am okay and nothing has happened.
    Mum: you don’t sound and look good
    Me: eeiii mummy, you will never change, besides you can’t see me
    Mum: my dear, a mother can feel the daughters pains even 1000miles away
    Me: Seriously everything is fine, and am okay, how are my brothers
    Mum: they are doing well She took her time to brief me about their achievements for the past 3years I left home, I couldn’t believe I followed a man to this extent and cut contact with my family I had an opportunity to talk to my brothers as well Mum: Darling won’t you ask of your love?
    Me: I know dad is fine, or he definitely will get over the heart break I was my dad’s heartbeat, He was my special friend and I know what I did will definitely break his heart
    Mum: He was broken but then still believes you will come home one day.
    Me: I hope he is aware am married and my place belongs just here with my husband
    Mum: talking of husbands; how is he treating you? How has marriage been like? Was it what you thought of? Are you happy?
    Me: you know too well to ask me this questions right now. Everything is fine, not what I expected but I knew it’s not going to be easy
    Mum: what do you mean, has that guy turned you into a punching bag already Me: Mum? No,I mean there is a lot to deal with, But I have grown and looking after somebody else.
    Not my mum looking after me anymore.
    Just then Clyde walked in to the sitting room
    Mum: Is he around, can I officially meet him now
    Me: I don’t think that’s the best way, besides he just got back
    Mum: My daughter, I just want to say Hi
    Me: okay hold on whiles I pass on the phone I walked to his door and knocked
    Clyde: What is it again woman, am tired of all this your whining’s
    Me: Clyde my mum is on the line for you Immediately, he opened the door and shoved me an eye I handed the phone to him and waited to take it back,
    I couldn’t tell what they were talking about close to minutes.
    But I did hear Clyde say am taking good care of her. No need to mention, I shrugged! What care He pushed the phone to me and banged the door to my face
    Mum and I spoke for some time and I hanged up promising to call back

    EPISODE 12

    “In marriage find a friend that’s got your back always but won’t break your marriage”

    Few hours later, my phone rang and it was my friend Bebe, She promised visiting next Saturday We hardly meet up due to the nature of her job but when Clyde and I were still in good terms,
    She comes over,we talk, and we do sleep overs,
    Which whenever it’s my turn to sleep over at her end, Clyde will insist to follow me to her end claiming “two are now one” His favorite love chorus which turns me on somehow.
    But now what do I get, I thought for a while. Saturday finally came and Bebe brought with her a lot of goodies, Clyde was home, they talked for a while and he excused himself claiming he has lots of work Bebe obviously did not buy that, neither did she buy my story of tripping When I told her about my leg, the reason why I couldn’t come over to her place the next day.
    She’s always too smart for my liking.
    She knows the Clyde she met would never abandon a visitor of his wife not to talk of her best friend just to attend to work, he always say work can wait Even when he had a million dollar contract to work on then, he still made time for his friends and family
    Bebe:Clyde’s Babs, what’s going on here, I smell something fishy
    Me:Bebe I don’t keep fish in my sitting room, it could be the odour from your three months Rasta.
    We all laughed over it,
    I thought I succeeded in changing her mind until she started again
    Bebe: seriously Babs, am your friend… tell me what’s going on or I sure will find out
    Me: Bebe relax there’s nothing to find out, we are fine
    Bebe: Girlfriend you want to kill yourself but I won’t let you, I know what’s going on
    Me: Please spare me the nosy attitude of yours,
    You know that’s the only thing I don’t like about you right I however know Bebe too well,
    When she feels something is wrong she will dig deep until she gets an answer. It’s either i find a nice excuse or she won’t let it slide. I then told her we had a little argument over adoption lately, and I have left him to cool off.
    Couples fight, you of all people should understand, You quarrel with Jake your husband all the time over silly stuffs, and how is mine different that I have to be summoned, I finally asked her
    Bebe:Common, what I see here is not a little fight,
    Besides I know you guys never had a problem with adoption Look,let me just tell you this,I saw your husband somewhere some time ago at first I thought he came with you but by the time I realized he drove away, I saw him again on several occasions And I made some enquiries he frequent there often with different ladies. I didn’t want to cause you any problems here, I came to see things for myself and it hasn’t been easy keeping that to myself
    Me: Bebe, what are you talking about, now my heart just dropped into my stomach, I could barely breathe I took a deep breath and asked are you insinuating my Clyde is cheating on me?
    Bebe: I didn’t say that, I just told you where I saw him.
    I was never going to tell you this but looking at things here, I think you need to know but please don’t confront him Babs, Babs, Babs, are you ohk? Bebe asked several times before I woke out of my reverie,
    Then I saw my husband walking pass us to the kitchen I stood up God knows I was going to beat the hell out of him Bebe held me down, he went back upstairs,
    Now I had no choice than to narrate everything to my best friend,
    We cried together and amidst the tears
    I couldn’t help but say continuously I love you Clyde, why are you treating me this way. Bebe stayed for the night, she planned on helping me get my husband back. Somehow Clyde never came out of his room or has figured I told Bebe something.
    We talked a lot, seeing a pastor was out but we resorted on a counsellor.
    We finally drifted to sleep.

    EPISODE 13

    “The answer is not ANGER, sometimes you just need someone to talk to and a shoulder to cry on”

    The next morning, everything seemed weird
    As Clyde made out of the house without his breakfast as usual, Bebe also left later.
    I felt lonely, I called Livie, we talked for a while, and then I thought of my dad.
    I dialed his number and he picked on the first ring
    Dad: Hello Wilson here, who am i speaking with I couldn’t help myself and I started crying amidst the mention of daddy.
    Dad: Barbara is that you, talk to me, what’s going on I quickly hanged up and laid on my bed, sleep came unannounced
    When I woke up, I missed 11 calls, 9 from my family and 2 from Bebe
    I quickly called her first and she said she’s on her way to my end so I decided to wait, While contemplating on whether to call my family back.
    I knew I had to at a point. Bebe came over and we talked for a while on which counsellor to see I suggested our friend Mrs Oke, I decided to call her and book an appointment since with her, Clyde wouldn’t object
    She was free that afternoon so Bebe and I drove there
    Mrs Oke: How are you my friend, you got me worried after the call. I hope everything is okay with you
    Me: Julia, that’s her first name.
    Everything is not okay, I then narrated to her what has been the issue for close to a year and a half now
    Mrs Oke: Barbara I knew it the moment the small talks started between you guys when we visited You guys seemed different from the Clyde and Barbara we knew, But then we thought you guys were having a bad day.
    So I told Bryan to let it go.
    Me:How did you figure that out, were we that obvious? And why didn’t you say anything Julia: We are friends, and friends know each other so well.
    But then what do you need from me now. How do you want to go about it?
    Me: I know he respects you a lot, at first I thought it was just something that will blow away soon
    But now am pretty sure it’s beyond that, and I can’t stand and watch myself go through this pain I was enduring it hoping it will be over soon I just need my husband back, he seems too far away, but I know he listens to you May be you can convince him for the counselling sessions, I really need to know what my offense was, why he is treating me this way
    Julia: Alright my dear, will talk to my husband and see if he can be present for the counselling session Please take it easy, we will talk him through this
    Me:Thank you, we gave each other a hug And I left with Bebe who was just sitting staring at us throughout my meeting with Julia. She dropped me home and drove away.

    EPISODE 14

    “When you tell mama and dada about your marriage baggage, mama and dada will always remember when you have forgotten”

    As soon as I entered the room, I saw Clyde with a paper sitting on the couch, I walked pass him and he yelled.
    Hey you, don’t you know how to greet?
    I turned and muttered good evening He just threw the paper i saw him holding earlier to my face I picked it up, made an attempt to read but I just couldn’t I dropped to the floor and started crying He stood up and walked pass me upstairs, there and then I found the need to call my dad
    Because I am definitely going back home just that this time with a broken heart
    But I dare not tell my Dad that part of my story
    Me: Hello dad, it’s your baby girl
    He complained of calling several times which I apologized for
    I was surprised even though I was at the verge of losing my marriage to a divorce Which was just thrown out to my face as if the past years meant nothing,
    I had the courage to stop crying when I heard my dad’s voice
    Dad:Baby, how have you been, how is marriage, your mum told me you aren’t fine.
    Has that man succeeded in destroying you?
    Me: Dad, not again, that man is my husband. Whatever mum has told you is not true. I am fine, you worry too much for nothing and thank you for not forgetting me. Dad: and why is your voice trembling,
    Talk to me or I will come down to Nigerian and whisk you away
    Me: Dad I called because, I miss you and wanted to clear the tension between us and apologize for not following your orders Dad: baby I have forgiven you, but promise me if you ever need any kind of help, Your home will always be yours. Whatever it is, I wouldn’t bring my parents into my marriage, not ever I have already failed the third party rule but then I trust the people around me right now. Just then Julia called and said she heard from her husband about the divorce papers.
    Apparently Bryan has spent a week trying to talk Clyde out of it but he has refused, So we should all meet tomorrow

    EPISODE 15

    “Take a minute when making life time decisions, ask yourself can I forgive myself easily when the need arises so you don’t end up with million regrets”

    Early the next day, Bebe came waiting to take me to Julia’s office. We got there, just when my husband came in from wherever he has been spending the night these days
    Julia: You are all welcome, so as you are all aware of situations.
    My husband and I will like to know your minds.
    If you are for the counseling or you still want to go ahead with the divorce.
    Me: to decide I just wanted to know what wrong I have done to deserve this kind of broken marriage
    Julia spoke up.
    Clyde over to you, answer your wife
    Clyde:Julia I don’t have to give an explanation to this lazy cheat of a wife
    Bebe nearly slapped him with those eyes of hers, surprisingly I was just so calm
    Julia: you think your wife cheated on you or you know she has and still does and please no insulting of each other, let’s be calm and find solution to this problem
    Clyde:I know she has with that doctor friend of hers, Livie.
    Please I just don’t want to be married to her anymore.
    Me:You know and you have evidence of that?
    Cut me that crap, between you and me, Who always meet his partners at the Majestic Hotel in Lagos, huh!
    And you dare call me a cheat.
    Livie and I were good friend until you told me to stop seeing him, Which I did because I love you
    What wouldn’t I do for your happiness? I love you, and there was no other man as you think
    Can’t a woman have male friends anymore when she is married?
    I don’t know where that is coming from, but I always tell you whenever I need to meet Livie
    You sometimes tag along, what’s the problem again’
    When did you start distrusting me as the love of your life? I mean I lost my family because of you, do I have to lose something for you again
    My good friend, yes; I lost him too for you What again, Clyde, answer me.
    Clyde: you are here lamenting like an angel, as if you don’t know what am talking about.
    It wasn’t once, it wasn’t twice. I saw you guys together
    Me: infact I don’t know what you are talking about, Just tell me when and what you mean you saw us together.
    Clyde: Am not here to argue with a tramp like you, besides he has seen whatever he needs to on the examination table.
    Do you have to go offering again?
    Me:Bryan, have you made the adjustment to the papers as I asked last night,
    Bryan: Yes I did, but are you sure of what you want to do?
    Clyde: what adjustments is she talking about Bryan? Talk to me
    Bryan: your wife doesn’t want anything from you as you stated in your divorce paper, She just wants about two months to get herself back to San Francisco She doesn’t need your help, she can sort herself out
    Clyde: And you didn’t tell me that because, well that’s not a problem, so far as she’s out of my hair in 2months, am fine.
    Besides she can afford to transport herself back, she can run to Livie for help that’s all she’s good at these days
    Me:You think this is about needing someone or money I already had money before you met me, so don’t make it seem like,I go offering myself to men for money
    Trust me, you will live to regret this Clyde, and when you do,it will be too late Because there will be nothing left to salvage Now pass me that piece of paper, I grabbed it from Bryan and signed
    Julia and Bryan thank you so much. Will call later
    I grabbed my handbag and Bebe confused as to what I just did, as she never spoke a word in there.

    EPISODE 16

    “It’s okay to cry sometimes, it gives you the clarity you need”

    I was silence throughout our drive home which Bebe insisted I stay at her end.
    I called Livie later at Bebe’s end, he came confused as to what i was blubbing about over the phone
    Now it’s Bebe’s turn to speak; I hope the allegations made against her are not true I trust my friend wouldn’t do anything like that, but it’s you I don’t trust
    Come down, I said amidst tears
    Livie:am surprised all these went on and madam here never bothered to tell me about it.
    I admit I like Barbara but as a friend, besides I have a partner of 5years.
    5years? Bebe retorted! Wow, so why are you not married yet, 5years is a long time
    Livie: we just understand each other, we are practically married already, and just the ring is missing We both hate the idea of putting on a ring We signed our own vows, hanging on our wall and that’s it, we are married Or whatever we call it, we are happy with each other, and Barby here knows my wife so well.
    They met several times over coffee, after I introduced them.
    So I don’t know what your husband is talking about
    Bebe: wow, I like this. Well am glad I don’t have to worry about you
    Livie: My partner will say this is stupid
    Me:that’s fine, am sure I will be okay.
    Just greet malia for me when you get home
    Livie:If you ever need anything don’t hesitate I left the next day to my house, well that’s not my house anymore Just for Clyde to question my whereabouts last night.
    Clyde: where do you think you are coming from?
    Me: Does that concern you, or didn’t you read my terms and condition of living in this house
    If you haven’t; it says I have no obligation towards you and am free to go where I want to and bring home whoever I want to So clear off my face, or you will see the other side of me For once, I like the way am handling a heartbreak,
    Maybe because somehow am still stupidly in love with him.
    I woke up late, since it was a Saturday, walked to the kitchen and met my ex-husband trying to fry egg which am not sure he has ever done.
    The last time he tried it was a disaster, so I intentionally stroll around pretending I was looking for something I couldn’t find. He keeps looking back to see what I was doing, then I heard him shout, ‘ouch’

    He burnt his hand while trying to hold the handle of the pan with once again his disastrous fried egg. He got it burnt again,
    I couldn’t help but laugh I quickly fixed my own egg, and sat beside him at the table. He gave me a look which I have never seen before.
    Was he starting to regret?
    I just gave him the rest of my egg and left to the kitchen.
    He seemed like he wouldn’t take it, so l left it on the table. I walked pass and he has eaten it, leaving his burnt one for the dog I think I smiled to myself and went upstairs
    Days passed by, and I realized I had to tell my parents I would be home in about some few weeks I was sitting outside by the pool one Saturday when I saw my ex-husband, in a polo shirt and his favorite jean trousers.
    Those were the same i gave to him as a gift on several of our shopping journey’s we use to go on I stared at him for a couple of minutes, my tears started to flow I told myself, I was never going to cry again, last week, but here am I now
    I quickly wiped my face with the back of my hand, am I starting to regret signing that paper I saw him walking towards his car, he looked so much handsome in that polo shirt now, unlike before I always tease him, the shirt looks on him like he just came out of a 30days fast.
    I kept watching him until he drove out, I was cooking lunch when Livie informed me he was going to come over with Malia.
    I thought that was a bad idea, but then I remembered I had no obligations towards Clyde so I can decide to do whatever I want to.

    EPISODE 17

    “Whatever you do violence is not the answer”

    Infact I was hoping they come whiles he is still at home, but then they came in a little early I was inside talking with Malia, while Livie wanted to pick up his phone from the car parked outside, Suddenly we heard some yelling’s outside
    Malia and I quickly rushed out, and saw Clyde holding Livie’s shirt at his neck
    Clyde however was trying to beat the hell out of Livie.
    We rushed to their end and Livie gave us a sign to pause and do nothing
    Clyde: What the hell are you doing here in my house?
    Livie: I came to see your ex-wife, since she has no obligation towards you anymore And you decided to let a good woman walk away just because of your stupidity and jealousy I came to check on her. Do you have a problem with that?
    Clyde: Did you just call me stupid.
    Well it’s not your fault, you got what you always wanted, now you can put on my shoes.
    I knew all those gynecologist appointments were just a means of sleeping with my wife
    After several yelling’s and insults from one end to another, I saw myself yelling out so loud
    Livie: Look, man you are making a big mistake here,
    You know a man slept with your wife, when you catch them red handed or you come face to face with the other guy. You should be able to tell right now I don’t have a thing for your wife, I never did If I did, she would be running into my arms, just after her divorce
    She isn’t that cheap, like the street ones you pick up
    Ooh you think I don’t know, Ruby, Mercy, Chinaza, should I continue, I have a whole list, I knew all along,
    I could have told your wife but then I wanted you guys to work your own thing out,
    When I found out you guys were having a problem
    The last time I visited was to confirm my suspicions, after I confronted some of the ladies after you guys met.
    Me:Livie and you never told me anything, what the hell is wrong with everybody around me
    Malia you knew too?
    Malia: Was just trying to do well by my husband, we agreed, your problems are ours but then we wouldn’t be part of breaking your marriage.
    We tried reaching out several times to find out if you guys are okay, but then we couldn’t really talk about it.
    Me: So that was what all these coffee meet ups, the how are you text messages were all about,
    and am thinking anytime I receive those messages from you malia, you guys might have met this cheat of a husband somewhere
    Malia: It wasn’t an easy topic to decide to talk about in just a day Me: So this started when and you two never bothered to talk about it right?
    All this time, Clyde was still face to face with Livie with his shirt in his grips
    Clyde:So you want to tell me you didn’t sleep with my wife, you liar
    And I can see you brought a camouflage of a wife,
    You both think you can fool me
    Malia or whatever you call yourself
    You believe this cheat of a man and this tramp of a wife here I then shouted stop it now on top of my voice, when I heard Clyde call me a tramp He immediately let go of Livie
    Malia and Livie tried to reach out to me on the floor and I slowly told them to leave me alone and leave my house, as if it was still mine
    I picked up myself from the floor and went inside
    That coward of a husband left the house like he always does
    What he didn’t know is I was waiting patiently for him this time I have been hurt too much not to do anything I waited until 1am when I heard his car enter the compound I quickly opened the door when I heard him turning the knob
    Me: Welcome you cheat, take a seat there
    Clyde:What is this? In my own house? Really?
    Me: I said take a seat, or I will beat the hell out of you now
    Clyde: And you want what now?
    I quickly dragged him to the seat, bringing the gun behind the door, holding a gun to his head
    He forgot he brought his father’s hunting gun to our house when he said he wanted to take me on a hunting journey.
    Clyde quickly sat down,and made several attempts to talk but with the gestures I made with the gun he couldn’t
    Me: I think I have been quiet enough, this is my time to ask questions
    I need correct answers, or you will see the other side of me

    Me:How long have you been seeing those girls? He wasn’t responding,
    I threatened with the gun again
    I said how long have you been cheating on me with those whores Answer me you coward, I hit him with the gun on his head and watched him yell out
    I said how long has it been?
    Clyde: 6 to 7 months, I think
    Me: Wow, you think?
    Really. I was about to cry but I realized if I do I might not achieve anything here yet
    I mean i gave you everything, my life, my body, my heart, Or was it something I wasn’t doing right?
    To the best of my knowledge we had no issues, with our sex life,so am asking you why?
    Clyde:Why? Because you cheated on me and you think you are that good in bed? Common Babs you and I know you fake it sometimes
    Me:Wrong answer, you think I cheated on you? Or you know
    And what makes you think I fake it, Besides should that be the reason why you should rip my heart out that way?
    Tell me what exactly, when or where, because I can’t remember a thing. Clyde: I don’t know what you want to achieve here, but this is like kidnaping, I can sue you
    Me: Go ahead, if you are a man.

    EPISODE 18

    “A mother in-law who rebukes their children for their wrong doing rather than supporting is a real keeper”

    Just then I heard a car pull in the compound and I saw my mother in law coming out I then shoved my eyes at him and asked; so you called your mum here to do what
    I am waiting to see what she will do, she better not try anything funny or else she will smell pepper I left him there, and saw him walking towards the door to meet her mum
    Still scratching and checking his head out
    I was in my room, and his mother came knocking
    I welcomed her and she enquired why I didn’t come down to see her, I told her I was asleep and had no idea she was around
    We talked for a while and I decided to cook dinner just for the sake of those days
    After laying the table,
    I told them I was not hungry and then was going upstairs when she insisted I just sit with them It was so weird at the table, I just kept burning inside, How this man destroyed my life and still had the guts to eat my food. They finally finished and I packed up the table and kitchen, just went straight to my room to sleep Woke up to an annoying knock on my door, it was my mother in law;
    Maa: We need to talk
    Me: By this time?
    Maa: Yes, besides its just 3am. And I need an explanation to why Clyde is sleeping on the couch
    And don’t tell me nothing, like he did last night, I noticed how weird and silent the whole house is since yesterday I arrived I know you guys, but your husband told me nothing
    Me: Maa with due respect, since your son told you nothing is going on, I think it should remain that way
    Maa: Come with me downstairs
    We walked to the living room and found Clyde sleeping on the couch His mum woke him up immediately while he struggled to get the sleep off his eyes
    Clyde: What is it again, I want to sleep Then he opened his eyes and saw me sitting on one of the sofas
    Clyde: What did you tell my mum?
    I hope whatever you told her, you included the fact that you cheated on me with your gynecologist and tried to shoot me down this evening with my father’s gun, if she hadn’t showed up, only God knows what would have happened.
    His mum shoved me an eye, and surprisingly, the mother in law, i thought i knew was somebody else for once I was always under the impression she supports the son even when he goes wrong
    The only thing she managed to say was OMG.
    That was it, she stood up and off she went to her room
    Without asking to hear my side of the affair tale.
    I can’t tell how I managed through the night, but I woke up late and Clyde was not home My best guess was he left for work.
    I met my mother in law at the dining table, chewing on something
    Maa: My daughter, you are awake, how was the night I was shockprised, couldn’t utter a word for a minute,
    When I finally found my voice I managed to say, yes Maa am fine
    She asked to join her at the table which I did, apparently she was waiting for me but couldn’t wait anymore so she took the lead.
    I contemplated on eating her breakfast, as I don’t know what is going through her mind, but if she had wanted to harm me, am not sure I would be awake now. We ate in absolute silence, until getting to the end of packing up the table she asked to see me when am done.
    I finished washing up, took along my copy of the divorce paper and headed downstairs I met her already in deep thoughts I decided to start the conversation as I know what she wanted to talk about.
    Me: Maa before you say anything, I want you to know,
    I would never do anything to hurt your son, before I could finish my sentence, she cut in
    Maa: I know you didn’t cheat on my son my daughter, I know my son so well
    He was a lot of things before he got married, though I understand he changed for you
    Anytime he becomes so insecure and aggressive with someone cheating on him I know he is lieing, besides you aren’t the first one he’s done that to.
    The only difference from the earlier one’s are you guys are married
    I know it might resurface again, those traits,
    I don’t know how much he told you about his past when you guys decided to spend your life’s together
    I was thankful he found someone who could love him despite his past, I know I defend my son too much sometimes
    But yesterday, I looked into his eyes when he was talking about you, I know my son too well and when he is lieing,
    I know my son too well, when he starts his things, I can tell if he is lieing or not so don’t worry, I believe you cannot hurt a fly
    She called several times before I came out of my reverie, simply because I was dumbfounded

    EPISODE 19

    “Once a Casanova, always a Casanova, you only believe you are that bad if you lack the overcoming spirit”

    Yes I know about my husband’s past, he told me he was a “Casanova”, but then I trust him after we realized we are so much in love with each other and can’t go a day without feeling what I know is love but now hatred.
    I loved him despite his numerous ladies he slept with in the past, I understood, his looks got him that far.
    Was I selfish to want to keep him all to myself, or I was stupid to marry a fine Casanova.
    Just when I was busy thinking about his past, my mother in law spoke up
    Maa: My daughter, how can I change this great damage that has been done?
    Am sure you have already taken in enough of his lies, And how he would defend himself when he is caught cheating.
    I know he cheated, the same thing he did to the many ladies we wanted him to marry, They all left, but you stayed.
    He told us, he got his act together, and I can clearly see that’s not true
    Me: Maa, this is beyond repairs, I then showed her the divorce papers.
    Maa: What? How? When? Then how are you still here.
    I narrated to her my proposal to stay for at least two months.
    Me: Look I love your son, but if he doesn’t want me anymore, I have to leave that wasn’t my decision, it was his and I accepted my fate the moment I signed those papers
    My intention was to stay for this two months and check if there are any regrets from his end but he is not going to change now, I have to get going too, my tickets and visa would be ready very soon
    Maa: You sure you don’t want to give it another try?
    Me: Yes Maa, I want to get back home to the family I have left behind for this one which only ripped my heart out.
    To be continued

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    June 30, 2017 at 1:13 am



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    Love Me Again

    By:Loudest Thoughts

    EPISODE 20

    “The pains we feel makes us stronger, though we may cry along the line”

    I seemed strong but I can break down anytime soon. I just pray for strength, though I had no idea what going on my knees to pray will do for me.
    After a week, I got so much worried he hasn’t shown up yet, I called her mum and she told me she hasn’t heard from him I asked myself why I was worried,
    I was in my room, after a week and 2days since he left home and I heard his car moving in I peeped through the window to check if he was the one, after confirming I laid on my bed, while informing the mum he was back. She muttered thank you and we hanged up Since then, it was I dodging him or he does I finally told my parents I was returning home They were so happy so didn’t ask too much questions
    Am sure they will when they realize I had no plans of leaving
    However, no day passes without lots of regrets clouding my judgments I wished things were different, but they are not, and I have to start leaving soon
    My plans are almost ready, telling my parents speed up the process with their numerous links
    Bebe never stopped calling, neither did the Oke’s
    Livie and Malia called later on to apologize after the last fight
    I admire what they have, no matter how much Clyde painted the story in front of Malia,
    She said she knows what her man can do, he is a lot of things but not a cheat and if he ever cheats, he wouldn’t have the guts to introduce the woman he is cheating on her with
    They are not perfect but this is what every couple should learn,
    You trust your partner to the extent that when the truth hits you in the face, you can still stand up for them
    I don’t know how I can get rid of this love, but I think with time, it will diminish I must admit I do love my husband despite the divorce and he ripping my heart apart,
    But somehow I still feel he is there and never going anywhere I was coming back one afternoon after a visit to the embassy and I met Clyde and a lady coming out of the room Their appearance and demeanor shows what they are clearly as if I wasn’t bothered,
    I just walked pass them to the room I quickly closed the door and started crying all over again
    I am now accepting the fact that my marriage is finally over I started packing up my things, the one’s I came here with
    I left behind the things I acquired with Clyde, I want nothing that will remind me of him Before he came back, I left to Bebe’s end
    I called up my Dad, to help finalize the papers I can’t wait for another two weeks as the embassy stated
    He tried putting words in my mouth, but I refuse to tell them anything even though I know at a point,
    I have to after a week at Bebe’s,
    Clyde never bothered to find out why I never came back home
    It’s not like it bothers me that much, but at least I was hoping he did

    EPISODE 21

    “Goodbyes are not forever”

    The next week, I was on my way to the airport,
    Bebe and Jake escorted me I saw myself at Heathrow airport the exact time I needed to be there in London
    My parents picked me up, everyone was in tears, but I was crying for another reason I left London for close to 5years now, am back but with nothing Well, I still have a life to get back to, I assured myself
    We finally arrived home, and nothing has changed My entire family, nuclear, extended and friends were waiting to welcome me home
    I had to really dodge the whereabouts of your husband question, but I knew I may not avoid forever
    Soon enough everyone left, and I was alone in my room when mummy came in
    Mum:How was your journey?
    Me:fine thank you, to be honest it was so hectic and am glad am finally home
    Can’t wait to get back to my life
    Mum:Oh really, How are you here alone, How is your husband, why didn’t he come with you
    Me: mum am tired, and too many questions at a time won’t help
    Mum: okay my daughter, we will talk later, welcome back once again
    Weeks passed and I keep avoiding the topic anytime we are having a family time
    As if I was hoping Clyde would come back for me soon and this nightmare of ever telling my parents they were right from the beginning would give me some relief
    A month of my return, no day passed by without wishing Clyde was here with me
    Bebe never stopped calling, the rest call once a while I was on phone with Livie and he was asking if I found someone else and I replied one heart break and a divorce is enough, I wasn’t ready to go through it again Just then my mum entered, Barbara,
    What did that man do to you exactly I can see it in your eyes, I can feel you went through something terrible And I just heard you are divorced, OMG!

    Your father will kill this man
    Me:Mum, stop yelling, yes am divorced, that’s what you and Dad wanted all along

    It’s over now, that’s all to it. You can leave now Suddenly tears engulfed me as if my tear duct just got opened. I cried uncontrollably until my mum wrapped her arms around me in a quick and calm hug.
    We stayed that way for quiet some minutes, until mummy spoke up
    Mum: am sorry you had to go through this,
    I can’t imagine how difficult that was
    But if you are not ready to talk about it, I will wait until you are. Now get some sleep
    Me:Okay mum, thank you.
    But I can’t talk to Dad, His anger I can face but the embarrassment and that I told you so, I can’t take it
    Please talk to him for me
    Mum:That’s not a problem, we are just glad you are back home in one piece
    I quickly laid myself on the bed,
    Which she covered me with a blanket like she always do when we were children I woke up somewhere late at night and saw my dad dozing off in the sofa beside my bed.
    He might have pulled it from its initial state Obviously my mum didn’t waste time to tell him about the divorce
    I quickly muttered Daddy and he woke up immediately asking if am okay
    I told him I was fine, he shouted out for my mum who quickly rushed in with a serving tray, which I assumed is my dinner? I asked what was going on, and they were behaving so weird
    Mum:You slept for close to 10hours, we were just so worried
    Me: Mum, am fine, I was just so tired from the journey that’s all
    Dad: Baby eat something please
    Me: Okay, I will definitely eat but not in here, Besides you guys don’t have to treat me like I just buried someone close, common, it’s just a divorce
    Am almost over it, you don’t have to pamper me
    So I don’t feel embarrassed about my failed marriage, which I know you two are so overjoyed about

    Dad:Barbara, stop it now, You think a parent will be happy to see the daughter go through this kind of thing
    Yes we are glad you are back safely to your home,
    And we were not in support of your marriage, but we never wished you harm
    Can’t a father pamper his baby girl anymore? Or we should have thrown you out when you came rather than welcoming you with an open arms, Or you think we actually prayed for you to fail in your marriage Me: Dad am sorry, I guess this whole thing is yet to hit me so hard, And am just finding an easy way out trying to give the blame to you guys
    He just stood up and left, mummy runned after him with the food tray
    I think this is the reality, Clyde is gone, he is no more mine
    Let me get out there, get some real work to occupy my time and mind
    All my life I have never done anything for myself like a real job
    I keep volunteering all over,
    Daddy’s big idea of me becoming his successor of the company since my brothers are still young. I do go in to his work place sometimes to run things, I will wait for him to cool down so I ask for that opportunity to be given to me once more
    I went downstairs and dad was not there, my brothers as usual were fighting over their video games then I went back to my dad’s door, I knocked severally before he asked to come in
    Me:Daddy, I said am sorry now, with that weird Nigerian tone
    I rushed to give him a tight hug, which he had no option to hug back
    Dad:you get me worried when you rebel and talk to me that way I hope you are fine, I know your mum promised you she wouldn’t ask for details But I wish you could tell me, but then I won’t push you. If you don’t feel comfortable talking about it that’s fine
    Me:Dad can you let this one pass please, I want to start afresh by going back to my duties at work
    Dad:Really, thank you my dear.
    Now I can rest for sometime We talked for a while until I decided I was going in for some coffee, since it’s late for heavy food.
    The next day I was ready for work, my dad gave me a tour of the office, nothing has changed that much
    My office space was still intact, I quickly got myself involved in work Day after day, I receive so much pampering from my parents, which is getting me worried
    When they start like that, they have something up their sleeves

    EPISODE 22

    “Don’t wait until you regret a wrong deed before you say sorry, Say it once the deed is done”

    Days and months passed by there is no show of Babs around the house, I asked the gate man and he has no idea where she went to
    I wasn’t bothered,
    I thought she was just avoiding me, since her wardrobe is still intact,
    Little did I know she took only the things she brought with her
    I went about my daily activities, from the clubs to restaurants I wasn’t ashamed of my life After work one day, I wanted to get something from Mr. Biggs for dinner since I can’t cook I was about leaving the place after getting my order, when my eyes caught up with Livie and Babs
    I only saw Barbara’s side cheeks but I can see Livie clearly, I quickly told myself, today their cup is full I quickly walked towards their table where they were taking selfies,
    And started shouting, Barbara today your cup is full
    Then Livie saw me and instantly stood up, everyone is watching us now
    I then shouted, Babs name and tapped her on the shoulder, she turned and I realized I was mistaken, this strange woman I always see Livie with isn’t my Barbara, it’s a look alike, but how?
    They look so much alike, the walk and especially her cheeks.
    The last thing I heard was, Clyde is that you?
    Are you okay, the way you are referring to my sister as Barbara I hope you aren’t hallucinating.
    By the time I realized where I was after that incident was on my steering wheel, driving to no particular place in mind. I may never be able to tell how I managed to leave the scene I created earlier
    I finally stopped at the thought of what if I was wrong all along,
    I quickly changed my thoughts to; remember she cheated that’s why she left I cleared my mind after some hours sitting alone and realizing I may never find answers to what am looking for sitting down in my car.
    I quickly drove home, and questioned my gateman
    Me: Do you remember your madam’s friend, the doctor I was exchanging words with the last time.
    He said he was here two times before he visited again the last time.
    Do you know when he came and what he did when he came around
    Gate man: Oh, the doctor Oga, he came first time with some two women to see Madam, and second time he came with the other woman. Some fine woman.
    They were very happy due to the laughs coming out from the veranda, I can’t tell what they were doing inside, but they sure look so happy and having fun
    Me: Thank you, I managed to mutter, I was confused and disappointed I didn’t find anything incriminating enough to confirm what I have been blubbing about along. Could this just be a mistake?
    Did I blame my wife for something she didn’t do? I went inside my room, sat for a long time, tried several times to keep the new drama out of my mind but I couldn’t. What about the text messages on her other line.
    Of course she hasn’t read most of them so she can’t confirm
    I need to get to the bottom of this.
    I went ahead to Bab’s room, which am fully aware she hasn’t been to the house in a long time.
    I looked around, there and then I realized most of her things are not in place.

    EPISODE 23

    “Communication is the root of every relationship, even the very little things needs to be talked about”

    I quickly called my mum, to find out if she knows the whereabouts of Barbara, She only told me to carry my own cross It’s not like I have confirmed anything yet, but I feel like my heart will explode
    The next day I went to Bryan and Julia’s house I knew very well, I lost them the minute I decided to embarrass them that way
    But luckily they were so accommodating, they told me they have no idea where Barbara is
    But I don’t believe them, I don’t blame them either, I just wanted a meeting between Livie and Malia So I can get some explanations as to why he kept sending my wife secret messages.
    I just hope they agree to come, But then what do I do with the truth am looking for Why didn’t I look for the truth rather at first? At this point a lot of things are going through my mind
    Just then Bryan called; Livie has refused to see me
    I then called Bebe, after millions of apology she agreed to see me
    She came to my place later in the evening
    Me: Please have a seat, what do I offer you
    Bebe: keep the drink to yourself and keep this conversation short
    Me: First of all am sorry, I know it wouldn’t change anything but I just wanted to know the whereabouts of my wife
    Bebe: your wife, have you forgotten how you threw a divorce paper into her face, Like she meant nothing to you after all these years
    For your information, I don’t know her whereabouts,
    Even if I do there is no way I will give out that information to you
    Me: Bebe please, I agree I might have messed up, I just wanted to clear my doubts
    Bebe: Really, Clyde you still talk about doubts when I thought you have finally come to your senses
    You know I think I should leave now,
    I can’t sit here and you insult my friend again, after all she has no obligation to you anymore.
    Bebe stood up to leave and all I could say is am sorry I couldn’t fathom what I was saying the sorry for, but I feel some tiny guilt and regret
    There and then, I called up Livie’s hospital to book an appointment for the next day I just couldn’t wait to get to the bottom of this
    I was finally called in to Livie’s office and he was like, you want to see a gynecologist or you brought someone with you
    Me: Livie you know why am here, could we please sit somewhere and talk
    Livie: This is my working environment, whatever you have to say can wait maybe when I close from here, I will see what I can arrange I just heard Livie saying next, then I knew I had to leave
    I checked their notice board and realized he will be closing in about 5hours I told myself I can wait, I was there close to 7hours, until he came out and I runned after him like a puppy running after his mum
    Until he waited and luckily didn’t ask any questions, he just told me to follow him
    We got to a house with a giant gate, I assumed that was his house, we entered and parked both our cars
    He called out to malia, who quickly came out beaming with smiles and gave Livie a hug then noticed I was standing at the door, she quickly withdrew and said Hello you are welcome She asked me to come in and have a seat, they both excused themselves for about two minutes, I could hear tiny voices in the kitchen as to they want to agree on what to tell me then they came out malia headed upstairs with Livie’s bag and Livie with a tray of juice I smiled, exchange of responsibility
    Livie: My wife will join us soon, oh there she is
    We officially exchanged pleasantries and I asked if I could talk Me: I apologize for causing your household some kind of disrespect, but am here to find some answer
    With what happened at the restaurant, I understand now why Barbara insisted she wasn’t the one
    That could only mean whatever messages I saw on her old line, I might have been mistaken too
    Livie: Which messages, from which number.
    I don’t get you Clyde
    Clyde: I have them here, from your number Livie take a look at it, I handed over Barbara’s phone to Livie
    I remember when I first saw the messages they really didn’t mean anything to me that much I thought it was just a friendly message until I met you guys severally at the restaurant which she denied
    I nearly believed until my secretary also confirms meeting you and Barbara there some time ago
    Malia: These messages were not from my husband, yes I admit that’s his number but we exchanged our second numbers a year ago I guess by then Barbara might have saved it with Livie’s name.
    You can even see it saved Livie 2?
    How could you distrust your wife this way, over just a simple message like this ones? What is wrong with saying I miss you or thanks for coffee, let’s do this again I can’t believe you could hurt a good woman over this kind of messages It just shows you don’t love her or even trust her.
    Me: OMG!
    Am so sorry, I just can’t believe I was this stupid
    Yes I admit I had a little personal issues,
    I battled with some weird feelings but I think I have gone too far I quickly muttered and they all agreed to my loudest thoughts Me: How can I make this right Livie, you are the only one who can tell me where I can find Babs,
    Livie: And what exactly do you think you can achieve, besides I have no idea where Barby is, Even if I do I don’t think she will want me to tell you
    Please am not sure I want to be involved in this anymore than I have already
    We talked for a while and after several pleas they refused to tell me where Babs is
    I went home so heart broken, for once I can see clearly now
    All feelings came rushing back in, I remembered how much my life changed after meeting Barbara
    How much a Casanova I wasn’t anymore, how much loving her changed me? I want all that back, at least if she doesn’t want me anymore, I just want her forgiveness
    Days passed by with no luck of finding Barbara, my parents weren’t willing to help either
    I got drunk one day and took a taxi to Bebe’s end
    She had no option than to take me in for a few days
    Most times I overheard her talking on phone with someone my gut tells me it’s Barbara because they seem to be arguing a lot
    After some few more days, she drove me home and told me i should start from where I found love
    I might definitely find love there again I thought she was giving me a hint as to where Barbara left to

    EPISODE 24

    “I will travel so many miles to tell you I love you again”

    So the next few weeks I made preparations for my travel to San Francisco On my arrival, I went to several places I know Barbara usually frequent but to no avail
    For three weeks, I got nothing
    Until one evening I met one of Barbara’s numerous friends back here who after narrating everything to her had pity on me
    Though she lost contact with Barbara after we left probably because I changed her number she managed to give me her dad’s company name
    Apparently it’s a well-known and popular company in London; THE WILSON’s
    I thanked her so much and took her line, just in case everything works out she can talk to Barbara again
    The next two days, I spent shopping for Barbara, I don’t know what she likes now Until I ended up buying nothing at all
    The third day I left for London, got there late so I booked a Hotel for myself which I had no intention of leaving now until I get my woman back
    I relaxed for 2days planning on how to get through to Barbara on paper
    The next day, I got a hired car, for the rest of my stay in London
    I was just so sure I will leave with Barbara soon
    I had so much luck in locating her dad’s company with the help of the driver
    I was just going to find out their house address from the receptionist because I had no idea she has started working in the same company she was running from I got to the receptionist, and met some handsome guy there waiting to see someone Just then the receptionist called out to him.
    Receptionist: Hello sir, Miss Barbara Wilson will see you in just five minutes.
    Handsome Guy: Thank you I got confused as to whether she works here now, so I got closer to the receptionist and asked if Barbara works here now, she told me she resumed work a month ago and hoping to take over from the Dad once he retires
    I asked enough questions just to be sure it was my Barbara
    I was so nervous when I saw the guy going up to see Barbara I waited outside in my car to catch up with Babs when she closed for the day but to no avail
    The next day I woke up early to stalk at her company gate but yet still nothing
    A week after waiting in the reception,

    I saw a figure walking to her car outside which I had no doubts it was Barbara
    She has become so much beautiful, with her curvy hips and her beautiful black hair With her 7 inches heel, her beautiful official wear, she modeled to her car, i tried running after her but then I got glued at one place
    But I managed to get her car number and colour which I can follow later some other day
    For now am in so much pain, so much shock as to seeing my Babs again
    I went back to the hotel, to get some rest, where I would continue the stalk tomorrow
    The next day, finally came and as early as 5am, I was in front of Babs Company I waited until she pulled in at 6am, I was wondering why the boss would come to work this early Just then I saw her coming out with some files and I followed her car
    At a point I felt she knew our car was following her because she kept looking in her mirror to see the driver
    We kept avoiding until she pulled in front of a huge and beautiful mansion, the gate is controlled remotely, so there is no way I can storm in there and ask of Babs
    So I stood far away, when she entered, and I left
    Now I know where she stays and work, so it’s very easy to talk to her. I took some days off my stalking, when I started again I realized she hasn’t been coming to work, close to 3days I asked the receptionist to book an appointment and I was told she traveled for a conference with her Dad and she has no idea when she will return

    EPISODE 25

    “Determination of a man knows no bounds”

    But I never stopped frequenting the company, until one sunny Saturday afternoon I saw her pulling out of her mansion in another car I guess she has so many, so I shouldn’t expect to see her in only one car
    I followed her until she pulled up at a restaurant with a guy leading the way in Instantly my mood changed, jealousy swept over my feelings, then I remembered the same feelings that made me loose her besides that guy is too young to be her “something” I encouraged myself
    I walked in after them, they got their order and was about to eat When I pulled another chair beside Babs
    Babs: What the hell?
    Me: Before you say anything, please hear me out, we are in a public place
    Babs: Oh really, so I should keep quiet when you are stalking me? Or you came here to finish what you have started
    I heard from my friends you might come, I know how smart you are, no matter how far I hide you will always find your way to hurt me again
    She said a lot of hurtful things and I just kept quiet, listened and the guy with her was just staring at me
    Me: Babs am not here to hurt you please,
    I instantly knelt down to the amazement and stares of on lookers.
    I sat on the floor weeping like a baby, She just grabbed her bag and pulled the young guy and they left the restaurant after leaving some money on the table
    I quickly runned after her, but she drove so fast away
    I told myself, today wasn’t that bad, and I quickly ordered another of the food they were eating earlier
    When I entered people were still staring at me like I killed someone
    I followed the order van to their gate where he delivered the food and left, I waited there to see any action but to no avail I went back to my hotel for a nap.

    EPISODE 26

    “Two hearts apart, even far away beats for one another”


    Mum:Babs what happened out there, I thought you guys went to eat out, but you came back early and the food has been delivered to you, it has a card too.
    My best guess is you have a secret admirer
    Me: What card? Which secret admirer?
    Mum I told you, I don’t want any man now.
    I tried telling my mum we lost our appetite and that we didn’t order for anything to be delivered,
    I quickly snatched the card from her before she opens it,
    Somehow am protecting this b-----d from my father’s wrath
    I have a good thing going on here with my family,

    Am working on adopting two kids and my life will be back to normal again I don’t ever want to get myself in that web again, well if I want to get laid there are a lot of them out there, I could just hook up with one random guy, besides am not sure I want to get laid now The words in the card pierced me so hard

    Hi Love,
    I can’t begin to say how sorry I am but I know, I was stupid
    I didn’t deserve you at first but I deserve you now
    Am a better man now, I know you have heard this before
    But believe me now when I say that is over.
    What should I do to make up for this? We have come a long way, I lost all my friends because I messed up Nobody is willing to help get you back
    I don’t care if I have to face your parents This time am ready to go through anything for you*
    Tell me we can start afresh
    Am sure by now you heard from your friends I was wrong all long
    Am sorry for breaking your heart and trust I miss you so much, your love, smile and the meals
    I know you want to start all over but kindly include me in your plans
    Even for the silent treatments, so far as I can get to see you every day, am sure I can bare for the sake of the love I have for you
    I will wait until you are ready
    Claytons Hotel room number 45A east end

    Clyde has a way with his words, they always get me agreeing to every bit of his silly ideas but not this time
    I tore the card apart whiles my mum stares on,
    I ordered the food to be given to the gateman Surprisingly my mum didn’t ask much questions
    I rushed to my room and cried a little, then I called up Bebe, malia and Livie they told me to do what I feel is right,
    I told them I am sure I don’t want Clyde back anymore, they insisted I don’t know what am talking about
    It’s true, I still love the guy, he stirs up this fire in me am not able to explain, and he gives me the chills
    I admit I want to be in his arms, even right at this minute,
    But I wish he would have apologized when I was still with him
    I would have taken him back, tore the divorce papers and give him a hot kiss to seal our marriage
    But now it’s too late, my parents are involved and there is no way, they are going to let me fall for Clyde again
    I was in my room when my dad came to enquire what happened today with the delivery i got
    I explained to him, I got this guy asking me out which I wasn’t ready for and he understood saying so far as it’s not that heart breaker of a husband then he is fine This man will do anything for his only girl,
    I must better warn Clyde to go back to Nigeria
    I love him but I don’t want to destroy my family again because my dad might end up killing him and go to jail for it
    I thought of what to do until I remembered, i didn’t get the room number off the card, I sure do know the hotel But am not going to go there asking for a room number like some stalker I will stay put, until I meet him again, I do want to see him again Since the last encounter with the delivery,
    I have not been able to get him out of my mind, I keep seeing his face everywhere now, at work, at home, my outings and everything.
    He seemed to have an effect on me anytime he is around
    My soul and body yearns for him, it wasn’t like that back in Nigeria when we had the issue and I was so bent on getting him back,I think the difference now is, he has apologized and dare do that in a restaurant, the Clyde I know is a lot of things but he is too proud to kneel and apologize in a restaurant full of people
    He may kneel to propose or give me special gifts, but not to the extent of sitting on the floor crying
    I thought for a while until sleep took over

    EPISODE 27

    “A kiss may or may not change that situation, give it out anyway”

    The next day at the office I asked the receptionist if someone came looking for me which she responded No, I was a bit disappointed but I sure know he won’t give up
    I was worried something might have happened to him, but I quickly brushed it aside when my dad came in to enquire what I want for lunch
    He then decided why not go out for lunch rather
    After a couple of hours, it was time for lunch
    I decided we should drive in my car
    A few meters away from the office I saw a car following us,
    I recognized that to be Clyde’s car after his last stalking game, I got nervous,
    I didn’t want him to meet my dad, because they certainly will be at each other’s throat
    I quickly pulled up at my dad’s favorite restaurant and saw Clyde pulling a chair in some corner
    I was thankful for that As our order was yet to be brought,
    I excused my dad to visit the washroom
    I beckoned on Clyde to follow me, he did immediately
    We met in the hall way, and he pushed me against the wall,
    I suddenly became weak, his fragrance, his masculine body and that face
    I was struggling to tell him to stand down whiles we talk
    He tried to touch and kiss me until the thought of him sleeping with all those girls came rushing back in,
    I pushed him so hard away from me and told him to stay away from me
    I warned seriously, when in the first place
    I was going to take his number and arrange a meet up
    I quickly adjusted my dress and left him there,
    I realized he didn’t follow me to the restaurant again
    My best guess, he might have taken the other way out
    I was done eating and I asked for the receipt when the waitress handed me a piece of paper whiles whispering a certain gentleman asked I should give it to you Just then my dad asked if there was a problem, because he saw me looking so funny, I quickly replied,
    I think I run out of money dad
    He just laughed and asked I should get my expenses to the accountant when we get back, he will get my credit card sorted out
    We left and I tipped the waitress for giving me Clyde’s number.
    When we got to the office,
    I picked up my phone and called his line
    He instantly picked up upon hearing my yells
    Me: Can you stop stalking me for Christ’s sake,
    Clyde: Babs, am sorry for coming down on you like that.
    Can we meet over a drink?
    Me: I didn’t call to talk to you
    Clyde: If you didn’t call to speak with me,
    Why then are you still on the call, i just quickly hang up
    He called severally but I didn’t answer
    I quickly called Bebe and told her what has been going on
    She only laughs at my predicament and teases me when she can, to her she wished i met another Clyde
    But whatever my decision is, she will always support me

    EPISODE 28

    “Whoever said love is for the strongest lied, everyone is capable of loving”

    Later in the evening, I was with my family watching the late news and my phone kept ringing which I refused to pick up until my dad spoke up, is it that stalker again?
    I realize you don’t want to pick up that call over an hour ago
    If he/she is still calling, they might be in trouble why don’t you pick up
    I picked up and told him to call me in the next 1 hour, by then we might all be in our various rooms
    Exactly an hour, I took my bath, gave myself a real good massage and put on my best lingerie as if Clyde was coming over, then his call came in, there and then I realized I was fantasizing over him Clyde: Hi love, how was your day
    Me: fine, what do you want Clyde. Can’t you leave me alone? Haven’t you done enough harm to my heart? Why are you tempting me this way? Was it a crime to Love you this much Clyde: You still love me?
    Me: No? What a stupid question to ask, I thought to myself

    Clyde: Please grant me just one meet up Me: Okay, tomorrow lunch time, Boyce restaurant Clyde: Thank you I quickly hang up before he could say something else I had trouble sleeping throughout the whole night, I can’t wait to meet him, I went to work in my best attire, my best make up and heel, I was so happy modeling on my office corridor beaming with smiles which I haven’t done since I came back from Nigeria. I remember I used to be so fun until I left London and came back, I kept watching the time until lunch time and I drove off to Boyce restaurant. When I got there I saw Clyde waving from one corner, He is looking awesome today sine the last time I checked, I got there and he pulled a chair for me like he always does back then We were all looking weirdly at each other in silent until he broke it.
    Clyde: I don’t know where to start from, but first of all Thank you so much for meeting me I want to officially apologize to you for my behavior in Nigeria Since then life without you has been painful, especially after I learnt the truth Me: And what exactly was the truth,
    Clyde: Common don’t make this hard already, I had my own share of embarrassment from your friends already, and do you know what I had to go through just looking for you?
    Me: and how is that my problem or my concern. You wanted the music that way so you must as well dance to the tune.
    You still haven’t told me the truth here you know.
    Clyde: Okay fine, I expected that response from you anyway, I know you didn’t cheat on me, and you love me enough to do that to me Am sorry I doubted you Love.
    Me: who is your Love Clyde? You think it’s that easy to call me all sort of names and still sit here listening to you trying to push your way back in my heart
    You think am that kind of lady who wants to get broken two times.
    Clyde: Babs I understand you, I know you don’t want me right now You are still hurt, am not expecting you to take me back either, but I do hope you would consider it
    I was stupid, I knew what I was doing will hurt you,
    But I did it anyway because I thought I was giving you a piece of what you deserve for cheating not knowing i was harming my own self
    Me: Clyde you broke me completely, I had you what do I need in a man again i just needed you to give me the benefit of the doubt Was I not good enough in bed, what else do you want, tell me
    Clyde: You were perfect, forget whatever I said I was bitter and finding ways of getting you out of my life
    Me: And how do you expect me to do that, you seem to have everything figured out, tell me how to forgive you, now I saw myself tearing up whiles Clyde made to touch my hands
    The thought of those hands touching those ladies,
    I pulled out and told him to the face I don’t want any virus, I have had enough
    Me:Clyde get those hands off me, before you can touch me, get all the test in the world done i don’t want to contract anything, after sleeping with all those girls
    I stood up to leave when he held me again
    Clyde:I didn’t sleep with those girls, and please don’t leave yet
    Me: So you were camping them or they were rather sleeping with you, i am leaving and don’t try to stop me
    He didn’t and I left quietly to my office i became so sad on reaching home and everyone was wondering what was wrong with me
    Two days and I haven’t gone to work nor left my room
    My parents tried but I just want an alone time
    The next day I was home and I got 3 hospital reports addressed in my name My mum handed me the reports and was wondering when and why I went to 3 different hospitals
    I was confused too, until I opened and realized Clyde took the tests i asked him to
    He is clean, no STD’s but he is down on blood
    I quickly called him
    Clyde: am guessing you got your report, what now Babs
    Me: Nothing Clyde, whatever you wish to achieve in sending this down to my house,
    Well it didn’t work, by the way you need some blood
    Have a good day
    I hanged up, he called severally which I didn’t pick up

    EPISODE 29

    “When a man takes the bold step its worth whatever comes out of it”

    The next day was Saturday, I just woke up and struggling out of bed
    When I heard my dad yelling and my mum telling him to take it easy i quickly rushed down in my morning coat,
    Just to meet Clyde on his knees and my mum preventing my dad to flare up again
    I took another look at him on the floor and then my dad I rushed towards my dad
    Dad: Hold it there, young woman
    How long have you been seeing this woman beater?
    Answer me, is he the reason for your weird attitude lately
    You don’t eat, you don’t come out of your room neither do you go to work
    Girl I won’t tolerate this again
    Listen to me carefully, go pack up your things, am sending you off to your aunts end
    And you get the hell out of my house
    Clyde: Sir am sorry, Babs I just want to make things right I could hear my dad still yelling
    Me: Clyde you better go now, and don’t come back
    At least this time he listened to me and left Everyone went their separate ways
    After 30minutes, I went to my dad’s room and met my mum still calming him down
    Me: We need to talk
    Dad: What about, the fact that you kept seeing that woman beater after all he did to you
    And had the guts to let him in to my house?
    Me: Dad I hope you haven’t forgotten this is my house too
    And I have the right to bring in whoever I want to
    And how do you know what he did to me or didn’t do to me
    Besides I didn’t even know Clyde would go that extent to step his foots in this house
    Yes I know he came down to London,
    yes I met him some few times
    Yes he is the reason for my weird attitudes
    But I never said anything about Clyde beating me up, and confirming it was the reason we divorced
    But Dad don’t you think am old enough to be wherever I want to
    For Christ’s sake am 28years i have lots of years ahead of me, to meet a lot of men, if I want to
    To have fun, build a family if I ever will
    Can’t you just support me, like you always do when I achieve something?
    You even go an extra mile for me when i fail
    How is this one different, How is my failed marriage not your priority
    That you have to embarrass your fellow man in that manner
    You can’t send me off to my aunt’s place like some kid unless you want me to rebel and leave again
    This time around i might leave forever
    I was walking away when my mum spoke up and told him i was right
    I waited to hear what he will say but he just stood up and went into their washroom

    EPISODE 30

    “Sweet words soften the heart, no matter how tough it may seem”

    I went back to my room and realized i missed several calls from an unknown number
    I decided to call back

    Me: Hello, I missed a call from this number Unknown number: This is Clayton Hotel as I mentioned earlier, do you know anyone here, please I might not have heard her mentioning it earlier, I quickly gave him Clyde’s name and asked if she could pass me on she asked to hold on which I did
    Clyde: Babs is that you, I hope you are okay
    Me: What were you thinking Clyde? What came over you, at least give me a heads up
    I hate you for this now
    Clyde: Am sorry Babs,I was just thinking of making things right
    I didn’t care what your dad would do to me so far as he would forgive me for your sake, am willing to come to your house every now and then besides you were not exactly happy the last time we met

    Me: The more reason why, you should have stayed away from my house You better don’t try it again

    Clyde: Babs am still in love with you, if that’s the only way to get you back I will
    Me: Get ready to loose me forever then
    Clyde: Does this mean you forgive me, Babs do you still love me
    i think I should come over more often, if two slaps from your dad can make you forgive me then I will want to take that every day, until you take me back

    Me: No to your first 2 questions but I hope you are okay, did you get your face looked at
    Does it still hurt, if it does get some ice on it?
    Clyde: Yes it hurts, it will need your touch, why don’t you come over Me: And where will I tell my dad am off to
    i suddenly found myself easing up and smiling at his silly comments Get some ice on it, you should be fine.
    By the way what happened to your cell phone, you called on the hotel line

    Clyde:I can’t tell, I think i might have dropped it accidentally in your house
    It was in my shirt pocket, i think when i got slapped and I fell on my knees it dropped Kindly check for me Me: Really, you did this on purpose so you can come back for it huh
    Clyde:Common who would want to come back for that kind of slap?
    Me: Meaning you have agreed not to come back here. Thank you And don’t think you are so smart, you think I would bring this phone over,
    i will send my driver to you later on
    Have a good day gentleman we hanged up, just then daddy came in
    Dad: Hi dear, how are you feeling
    Me: Am fine dad
    He came to sit on the bed with me
    Dad: You know your well-being is my top most priority
    Sometimes I still think you are my little girl And I will do anything to make you happy and protect you from any one that wants to harm you
    As you said earlier, you are old enough, so I won’t send you off to your aunt’s but don’t try threatening me of leaving forever, you don’t want to kill me right
    Me: Dad I love you, and I don’t want to do anything that will kill you
    Whiles in Nigeria, there was no day I didn’t think about you guys My husband always say I should give it time that you will come around
    So many times he tried calling the house for me but I stopped him Dad he is a good man, but he has some stuff am sure he needs to work through Whatever happened and we divorced,
    I don’t want to talk about it either
    Can you give him the chance to get to talk to you?
    He always wanted to
    Dad: Does that mean you have forgiven him and want to go off with him again
    Me: Dad i didn’t say that either, what am saying is Clyde has a lot of pride and for him to come in here after telling him you might kill him shows he regrets whatever he has done and wants to apologize

    Dad: He hasn’t done anything to me, to apologize for,
    He should be apologizing to you, he dare not step foot in this house again Whatever you want to do I won’t stop you, Just tell him i don’t want to see his face ever again in this house

    And he dare not try taking you away to a no man’s land

    Me: He has apologized, am sure he wronged you when he married me without your blessings He wronged you when he broke Daddy’s little girl’s heart
    Give him the chance to make up for it

    Please dad, do this for me and i promise not to marry him again
    Dad: Are you sure you are going to keep to your promise

    Then I will think about it

    Come down for lunch, your mum is waiting i went downstairs with my dad, thinking if i just did the right thing

    On getting there, my mum found Clyde’s phone and handed it over to me

    EPISODE 31

    “Don’t hold yourself back whenever your heart wants something, take the risk”

    After lunch I went back to my room and called him up at the hotel, told him my driver was bringing over the phone later that evening

    But then at 7pm, i saw myself at the Clayton Hotel
    How did I get there,
    I drove myself there
    I made the receptionist call about my driver,
    I was asked to go in,
    I gently knocked on the door just for him to open up
    With his towel wrapped around his waist and that his masculine body was glaring at me
    What a temptation, as soon as he opened the door and saw me, he got shocked at the door
    He could not utter a word, at least he tried and the words were not coming out I finally spoke up
    Me: Won’t you let me in or I should go

    Clyde: Come in, my bad By the way what happened to your driver?
    Me: He went home early

    Clyde: Kindly sit on the bed

    Me: I prefer the couch, thanks and you look confused.
    Are you going somewhere?
    Well I have no plans of staying for long, i keep stealing glances while he changes in front of me
    I could just imagine the bare chest, all over me
    I love hairy men, I wouldn’t know what I would have done if he weren’t hairy
    I kept fantasizing over his hairy chest until he spoke up
    Clyde: Kind of, I wasn’t expecting you that’s all, You can stay as long as you want to

    Me: By the way check if this thing still works I handed him the phone

    Clyde: Thank you for bringing this, What should I offer you, I have everything
    Me: Nothing am fine and should be on my way before my dad starts looking for me Clyde: Did you tell him you were coming here Me: No, am old enough to take my own decisions

    Clyde: Does that mean you aren’t going away from here
    Me: No, just then his phone rang

    Clyde: Can we cancel? Yes I know, I will pay the extra, you just save it
    Later then

    Me: I can tell whoever it was, wasn’t happy you cancelled,
    You can go, I just came to drop the phone, and it’s working perfectly
    I should be on my way now

    Clyde: Are you sure you want to go?
    Me: I stood up headed towards the door when he pulled me towards his face

    Held my face up, stared for a few seconds
    As if he was looking for some answers
    He searched my eyes for another seconds
    And he started kissing me for like a minute and pulled away panting

    Me: Sorry I have to go, I thought him pulling away means i have to get going
    I rushed out of there, as if I just saw a ghost I walked straight to where my car was parked, I heard Clyde calling me but I ignored and drove away I went straight home and to bed, my mind hovering and crowded with what just happened I kept asking myself what just happened repeatedly Clyde didn’t stop calling I had to turn my phone off I managed to get some sleep, not after fantasizing about the kiss one more time, I think I love it, it made me feel something different I drifted off to sleep

    EPISODE 32

    “Express your feelings if you have to, it doesn’t kill “

    Woke up late since it was a Sunday, several missed calls I decided to call him
    Me: hello, ermm I was busy
    Clyde: Before you say anything, I would like to say sorry for yester night
    Hope I haven’t ruined my chances
    Babs I want you, I need you
    Please give me another chance
    Me:I will think about it, please have a nice day
    Clyde: When should I expect an answer from you?
    Me: I will let you know I quickly hanged up

    Just then Livie called I gave him the latest gist, he wasn’t too happy about it
    But I told him I will be fine, besides am sure Clyde has learnt his lesson
    We talked for a while, and I got out of bed downstairs
    My mum was staring at me, and finally asked I should spill it out
    I told her there was nothing to talk about
    She then said whatever it is, if I am happy she will support me
    I said thank you and asked what he thinks about Clyde
    Since before we got married they didn’t get the opportunity to know him that well
    She said from afar he seems like a nice guy, but she is yet to have a talk with him
    I wondered how she is going to do that without pissing off dad, besides she doesn’t know where Clyde stays
    Days turned into weeks, Clyde comes over to my work place to take me for lunch
    He comes over to my house but had to wait outside for me Sometimes we just sit outside in his car and have long chats Or take walks in my area, I just could not stop admiring him each and everyday
    One working day, he came for me for our usual lunch I was quiet busy so he just sat there in front of me, while I finished up Just then my dad came in, their eyes met and I was kind of nervous
    Clyde: Hello sir, Good afternoon

    Dad: I can see you are busy here my daughter, was going for lunch, Wanted to find out if you will tag along but let’s meet at home
    Me: Dad sorry another time. I have plans already

    Dad: Young man, Saturday 7pm, my house
    Don’t be late, I believe you can find your way
    Clyde: Yes sir
    When he left, Clyde asked me what just happened I have no idea either,
    I was just staring at you guys
    Clyde then decided to cancel our lunch date so I can go with my dad

    I watched him go away sadly, I then went ahead with dad’s offer Lunch it was at ‘’spicy’’ his favorite spot I can’t just wait for Saturday 7pm

    Clyde was so happy about it, I on the other hand was nervous considering I know my dad so well Clyde and I seemed to be doing a lot of talking these days,

    And since the last kiss he hasn’t tried any move again
    I was beginning to get worried I mean it’s not like he doesn’t want it too I just want to explode anytime am around him
    These are the old feelings I wish never resurfaced again I am beginning to like him gradually again

    The hatred I think I can bear, but this torture of not being in his arms is killing me already Saturday came and Clyde was early as a bird
    He came an hour before time
    I was going to take my bath when my brothers prompted me my prince charming is here
    The way they said it was funny I quickly put on a short and a tank top, I rushed downstairs

    EPISODE 33

    “That feeling that wants to make you explode, that one that makes you young at once, don’t lock it in”

    He indeed was looking like a prince charming With his cute pink shirt and blue trousers, simple and I noticed he got a hair cut
    He sure knows how to pick them, I rushed down the stairs like a small girl
    I was going to embrace him, am not sure what was going on through my mind until I heard my dad’s husky voice, Clyde was then looking in my direction
    Dad: Hey young lady, careful you don’t fall Shouldn’t you be in something proper?

    Me: Dad, this is proper, besides am in the house It’s not like you are taking me out for proms
    Dad: Okay fine, suit yourself go help your mum then As if my dad was trying to prevent me from meeting Clyde
    I nearly said something, but Clyde shove me an eye I wonder what that meant
    Dad: Young man, are you always this early or you are trying to impress someone
    Clyde: Sir good evening, my watch deceived me Dad: You need to get a new watch then, or you might be late to the white house
    I hid behind the blinds and once I saw my Dad going back upstairs i came towards Clyde The atmosphere became weird
    Me: Hey, did your watch really deceive you or you just outsmarted my Dad
    Clyde: How are you,
    I hope you are not dressing up this way for dinner
    Me: Why are you all worried about my dress
    Besides am yet to take my shower so, I might change
    Why you don’t like it?
    Clyde: Wow! That was straight forward,
    Like is an understatement, I love it
    We were suddenly looking at each other weirdly
    He reached out to hold my hands, which I didn’t object
    Just then my mum interrupted us

    Mum: emmmmmmm, welcome gentleman
    Barbara why is he still standing
    Young man have a seat
    And where do you think you are doing
    Me: Am having a seat too mum

    Mum: suit yourself, and why isn’t he served with anything

    Clyde: I just got here, besides am fine for now

    Mum: Young man, I have been wanting to talk to you for some time now
    Am sure Barbara might have told you something What’s your name again?
    Clyde: Clyde Obi, Maa
    Me: I don’t intend asking you what happened in between you two Because Madam here refused to tell us anything and am sure you won’t either
    But I just want to know your intentions this time I love my daughter, if she is happy, I am too she seemed to be much of herself since you arrived unlike when she came home
    Clyde: Maa, am really sorry for whatever happened between Babs and I
    I acknowledge I hurt the entire Wilson family when I took her away at first just to bring her back broken
    I can’t begin to say i can fix it, but I know if given the chance i wouldn’t go that way again
    I did a great harm to this beautiful woman here, And I can’t turn back the hands of time Maa, simply put I love your daughter, and I would do anything for her this time
    Mum: well, if it were up to me alone, I would say you both are old enough to make your decisions But we have there the man of the house, Barbara is her Gold, He won’t let her go this time, though she is of age
    At this point, I was fumbling with my fingers i almost cried out loud, as his words touched my heart i keep stealing glances until, I heard some footsteps from upstairs
    I knew it was my dad, I quickly dashed to the kitchen I came out laying the table and everyone was sitting watching some boring cartoon
    Both mum, dad and Clyde were quiet, I was wondering what was going on with them
    I passed by as if no one noticed, I quickly showered, put on my best outfit and came out
    My dad shouted, finally the queen of the house has decided to let us eat

    EPISODE 34

    “You know you still love them, if you can remember every little details about their worst fears”

    We all moved to the table to dine I made to sit by Clyde but my dad quickly asked i sit beside him
    We ate in silence, just then my mum asked for dessert to be brought i quickly shouted, my husband doesn’t eat that one, he is allergic
    Give him the other, just a little or he might grow too fat
    I actually made that for him, knowing what he likes and don’t, since my mum doesn’t

    It didn’t occur to me what I had said until I realized everyone was quiet

    When I finally knew what I did, I kept staring at Clyde who couldn’t wipe that smirk off his face
    Just then, my dad stood up
    Dad: Young man follow me, I knew I have worsened things
    I quickly followed, my mum didn’t want to be left behind
    Dad: Have a seat, and now tell me what you did to my daughter
    I want to know if you are worthy of her again
    Me: Dad I thought we were never going to talk about that
    Dad: Barbara, this is not your concern, I made that promise to you
    Not him, so allow him and get off from here, you two

    Pointing to mum and I Young man talk, am listening or why did you come to my house the other day for
    Was it not to confess and ask for forgiveness?
    Clyde: Yes sir, I …. I….I … I know I have wronged you and your daughter
    Kindly forgive me and I want to properly ask for your daughters hand in marriage, if you will approve, that would make me so very happy
    Dad: What? Are you out of your mind? You think I want to see my daughter go through whatever she went through again Never, over my dead body
    Now get the hell out of my house and don’t ever come back
    I said go, and don’t look back

    Clyde: Sir please, am sorry this time
    I was in tears for the embarrassment Clyde is going through

    Me: Dad, how could you embarrass my guest this way?
    He had problems with me, not you i don’t need you fixing my problems for me, i grabbed Clyde’s hands and asked him to follow me
    He hesitated a while, i told him if he wants to be lynched then he should be my guest,
    He quickly looked at my mum who beckoned him to go, then he runned after me
    By this time I was at the door
    We left the compound in his car,
    He kept driving until he stopped
    Me: Why are we stopping?
    Clyde: Am sorry Babs,
    I just couldn’t tell them what they want to hear, It would sound so stupid, I wanted to but it wasn’t just coming out
    Me: Then drive on, get me out of this environment

    EPISODE 35

    “Breaking a promise you know very well you can’t keep is like breaking a woman’s virginity”

    Clyde drove straight to his hotel
    As we entered, I just quickly lied on the bed while he kept walking in the whole room
    Me: Clyde you are disturbing, can you relax for a minute
    I want to think, and leave my Dad to me

    Clyde: I caused all this, I don’t exactly know what to do You haven’t even forgiven me yet Me: Yes it’s all your fault It’s not that easy, I keep playing the drama in my head.
    Clyde: What drama are you talking about? Me: How you found the courage to sleep with all those girls I don’t have a problem with you sleeping with them Infact I knew you can, you are capable Once a Casanova, always a Casanova, But my problem is you promised you wouldn’t I trusted you, I took your word for it because I loved you too much not to believe you You read me those nice vows and you broke them What happened to the part where you said you would die After sleeping with any w---e again I guess you are still alive, congratulations He then moved closer to me, and knelt by the bed holding my hands Clyde: Love am sorry, I didn’t exactly sleep with them, Those girls, yes it’s true I met a number of them several times But with several of the girls at first, I couldn’t get it off, So I just resorted to them entertaining me I just lie down and watch them dance, these girls are good dancers That’s how it has been with them, I didn’t touch them I swear I couldn’t just bring myself to break my promise to you, Even though I was so sure at that time you were cheating Some just listen to me talk about my problems, that’s how it started at first.
    Me: What do you mean by you can’t get it off, And you are so proud of yourself telling me, they only entertain or listen to your problems Why was I married to you then, to just grace your bed?
    Clyde: I mean I wasn’t attracted to them like I was to you
    I know I failed in the communication bit but please can we forget this
    We have a situation on our hands, i want to be with you once again
    Please give me a chance, he tried to kiss me, which he succeeded after several attempts
    It was refreshing, i like this new Clyde just then he made his way beside me on the bed, which he tried to undress me
    I covered my face with my palms like a small girl for some minutes, he nearly succeeded, but I quickly held his hand
    Me: Please am not ready
    Clyde: No problem, I understand I can wait as long as you want me to

    Me: Thank you, can you take the couch?

    Clyde: Alright, Going to bed already
    Are you sure you don’t want to tell your dad, you are okay?

    Me: No, let him cool off, Goodnight

    The next morning, we got prepared i needed to go home,
    Clyde drove me home On the way he asked what came over me during dinner that i called him “my husband”
    I just told him nothing, that he should mind his own d--n business I wondered myself how that happened,
    I guess i was just used to his likes and dislikes
    We finally got to my gate, he dropped me, gave me a peck and watched me enter, before he left

    EPISODE 36

    “Sometimes you just need to take that bold step, don’t let your guards down”

    I got to the house, and I met dad waiting in the sitting room
    Dad: Thank God, he muttered silently
    I just passed by and went up to my room Few minutes later, he came knocking

    Barbara open this door, I delayed a bit then opened
    Dad: You are breaking my heart, I don’t want you going off again Am just trying to protect you, don’t you understand?
    Me: Dad I told you, I don’t need protection at this age, just your support Dad: Remember you made me a promise not to marry him again
    Me: Yes I know, I don’t intend to break that promise, I just need you to stop being so rude, and embarrassing him anytime he comes here I need to do this alone, Can you please let me You said you want what’s best for me, My happiness is your top priority, then let me handle this my own way
    Dad: Okay, Am leaving you alone,
    I know Dad wouldn’t give up so easily though he just said okay,
    The house has become so uncomfortable for me, as my dad gives me the Daddy attitude, and I still struggle with decisions concerning Clyde,
    Yes I do want him, but the fear of going all in and I crush again, Finding it difficult to forgive him is one thing I can handle, but not my recent feelings that I have to battle with.
    I might explode soon, He seemed to have regretted and I can see that I want to be with him, but then there is my family, I don’t want to run off and leave behind again
    In case something happens, I might not be able to forgive myself, I’m always afraid he might break my heart again, I can’t trust him again
    Who would after toying with your heart, What if it happens again? I might not come out of it
    Was in my office, thinking about all these
    Just then Clyde just opened the door on me, startling me
    Me: What the hell, can’t you knock?
    Clyde: Geez Babs, i guess I should go then
    Me: No wait, am sorry

    Clyde: Troubles at home? Or it’s me
    Me: Both I exclaimed, Just a bunch of problems on my mind right now
    Loving you is so easy, but letting go is not easy
    Clyde: Then don’t let go, Babs If you want me to spend my whole life apologizing, i will so far as I get to be with you
    Me: You’ve hurt me so bad you know
    Clyde: I know, it won’t happen again please
    Me: You know I may never be able to trust you right?

    Clyde: I understand, and I will take my chances
    Me: Okay then, what are you doing here by the way
    Clyde: Okay then what? I came to take you out on a surprise lunch
    Me: Okay then, nothing Lunch I see.
    But I have a better idea
    Let’s go home, give me just some few minutes to wrap up from here.
    After some 10 minutes, she insisted we drive in his car
    While he ordered his driver to take the rest of the day off
    We drove off, while he drives I kept stealing glances
    We drove in silence until we got to her place as we entered my parents were busy enjoying each other’s company
    Then my Dad flared up again
    Dad: I thought i told you not to come here again, as my mum calmed him down, Clyde’s face was down the whole time
    Me: Dad i thought we spoke about this, We agreed you aren’t going to treat him this way again
    Dad You keep hurting me every now and then, Yes he wronged me first,

    Am yet to forgive him, I suggest you do same, It hasn’t been easy on me, don’t make it any harder
    I then pulled Clyde with me upstairs, As my Dad and Mum looked on and Clyde keeps looking back
    We reached my room and I locked up the door
    Me: Am sorry about earlier, let’s give it a minute and I will fix up something to eat
    Clyde: I should be apologizing, you defended me out there
    Thank you, and am guessing this was your plan all along, to piss your Dad off and you have a nice room here

    Me: Am glad you know that now, I just want you guys to get along then I can have peace
    Clyde: Does that peace include marrying me? Babs I love you

    Me: I will pretend i haven’t heard you,

    Let me just get us that food now i quickly rushed out just to avoid exploding in there Only God knows, I wanted to tell him I love him too, but I guess i may never be able to
    I got the food fixed, we ate inside my room, After eating we resorted to all kinds of games, Pillow fights were not excluded
    One thing led to another and we found ourselves in heaven, I guess we were about to have a second honey moon, just then my dad’s voice came calling
    I would have regretted sleeping with Clyde if my dad hadn’t come, i quickly pushed my dress on while he did the same, on opening the door for my dad, he kept looking inside as if he lost something
    Dad: Young man, can i talk to my daughter alone?
    You can wait downstairs And dress properly in my house, Clyde was still battling with getting his buttons fixed
    Me: Dad we can talk in your study, Let Clyde be please

    EPISODE 37

    *“As you are busy with your anger, remember that’s when good opportunities come”*

    I went with my Dad after he gave him a weird look
    He said he is ready to listen to me now
    Dad: Am guessing you know why I called you here
    Am ready to talk to you now
    What are your plans for that home breaker?
    Me: Dad, his name is Clyde and am yet to figure that out.
    Whatever my plans are, I promise not to run off with him if that’s what you are thinking, I just know i still love him for what it’s worth, I want to give him the benefit of the doubt
    Can you at least be nice to him from now on because he is going to frequent this house more often
    Dad: Alright that’s enough, Do whatever pleases you
    Just make sure am not around when he comes here i don’t know how exactly you got your mum on your side
    But you have succeeded,
    But know one thing too am never going to give you my consent ever to marry that fool
    Me: Dad you don’t have to worry, am not going to marry him
    And thank you for making this easier for me i won’t disappoint you this time i smiled to him like a small kid and rushed down to my room
    I saw Clyde walking around uneasily,
    Clyde: Are you okay, hope he hasn’t done anything to you
    Me: What are you insinuating,
    Please my Dad can never harm me
    Get that into your head, unlike you
    Clyde: Babs, common i was just worried that’s all I didn’t mean to,
    I guess I have over stayed my welcome I will call when I get to the hotel
    Me: Please stay, I want you to stay
    Clyde: What for?
    So you keep rubbing my mistakes in my face every now and then
    Common Babs,
    You are no different from your Dad,
    If you keep making me feel like the worse person ever I haven’t killed anyone,
    I understand I broke your heart that am sincerely sorry, that I am ready to say sorry every morning for
    You think it’s easy to deal with this heavy guilt am carrying it’s not, every day I see you, I remember too okay
    Am a human being too, I made a mistake but just don’t make it difficult for me, I made to hold his hand, he just pulled away and left, banging the door on me.
    I made to follow when I saw my parents staring at me
    Mum asking what’s going on and Dad looking victorious
    I knew he didn’t bring a car so it will be difficult getting one, I went out and he was nowhere to be found.
    I called him severally but he didn’t answer his cell
    The hotel claimed he wasn’t back yet
    Days passed by and no sign of him, I was beginning to miss him.
    I went to the hotel and met his absent, i waited till evening, and he’s a no show.
    I came back home with my dad asking me if I have found him, I was surprised and retorted silently to myself why does he care
    Just then my Phone rang it was Clyde, I quickly picked up
    Me: where the hell have you been? You just run off anytime there is an issue, Clyde I don’t want to go through this again.
    It’s not healthy, Now tell me where you have been.
    Clyde: Why don’t I tell you that in person.
    Am outside your gate, am not sure if I should come in, I quickly run off, meeting Dad once again by the pool

    It seems he always want to be where I am with Clyde, I quickly opened the door remotely and saw him by his car
    I rushed to hug him, which lasted for some few minutes, When I finally let go, he asked if we could go somewhere

    EPISODE 38

    “Where there is love, there is happiness”

    I totally agree with him, no more drama from my Dad
    We drove to a restaurant in town.
    We both ordered our favorites and had a sit down, after some minutes of total silence, he spoke up

    Clyde: So you want to know where I have been right. I went to the next state, planning a surprise for you except now it’s not a surprise anymore
    My mind was just not with him at the moment thinking of how to break the news to him
    Me: Clyde am rea…ready n…ow I stammered, and finally managed to get my mind back to the present
    Clyde: Ready for?
    Me: To be with you now dummy
    I want to try a different approach to love now,
    I want to give love a chance
    He quickly stood up from his seat, picked me up and gave me a deep kiss, which I didn’t resist for about 2minutes, which he said thank you
    You won’t regret this, he finally said
    We finished up and he drove me out of town to a new apartment, Guessing that was the surprise,
    He wanted to get a place here instead of staying at the hotel, in case I take too much time to forgive him
    I just stood there in the apartment and asked him if he has already paid for it
    Am glad he said No, I told him to hold on.
    From then, he comes to my place whenever he is free and my dad just shrugs and leaves the scene.
    i took my time to tell my friends back in Nigeria what is going on they warned him if he ever tries anything like that, they will personally slaughter him
    You can’t laugh, the look on Clyde’s face, especially how Bebe stressed the I will kill you part

    EPISODE 39

    “Love is possible when in pain”

    I spoke with his parents, and they are only going to forgive him
    When they see changes in his behavior
    Am not sure I have fully forgiven him yet, but one thing am sure of is I still love him
    I don’t know how I can still love in the absent of forgiveness.
    After a few weeks, I was with dad and mum watching some program on television, when we heard our door bell ring.
    I went to get it, just to see Clyde standing there smiling
    We had no plans, we spoke 30minutes ago and he told me he was going to sleep
    Me: What are you doing here? I mean you didn’t mention you will be coming my dad is around, and we are having a family time
    Clyde: Babs relax, at least let me in
    Am glad your parents are here, I came to see them
    Me: What for? Please don’t ruin anything we have going on now
    Clyde: I don’t intend to, I let him in after a peck and a hug, I saw my dad adjusting himself in the couch
    Me: Dad before you say anything, I didn’t know he was coming but he said he wants to talk to you and mum.
    So please and please just hear him out
    Dad: Young man, have a seat, what do we offer you
    Clyde: Nothing sir, Thank you for this opportunity

    At this point I was nervous, Clyde don’t blow this up for me.
    We all sat and was eager to hear what he had to say
    Clyde: First of all, am sorry once again for anything, And my Dad yelled, Go straight to the point, I don’t have all the time.
    At this point I kept staring at him
    Clyde: I want to marry your daughter, officially now.
    We three all chorused; WHAT?
    Dad: Are you out of your mind, I allow you to do whatever it is you do with her these past months because I made her a promise.
    Now here you sit with me with this rubbish, This is the last of your stupidity, I will take, Now get out before I say something else
    Clyde just sat there with his head in his palms
    Mum: My husband, don’t you think you are being over protective
    I mean allow them to do what they want
    You can’t make a decision for your 28 year old daughter, She’s right here, ask her, If she likes it why not
    Dad: Woman, you talk as if you don’t love your daughter
    And as if she has ever made any right decision for herself
    Me: Okay enough

    EPISODE 40

    “if you still want to be in their lives, you must think smart”

    Clyde am sorry about what I have to do I can’t marry you, not ever
    Clyde: Babs, how, why, Are you still punishing me?
    Me: Clyde, you know I want to be with you
    But not in another marriage
    But we will do it my way this time.
    Marriage is not the only way to be with you
    This time, I saw my dad in a regrettable state, as if he was feeling pity for Clyde
    Clyde: Why are you doing this to me?
    How would that even work?
    Me: You know am finding it difficult to forgive, trust and get my head around issues
    But that doesn’t change the fact that I want to be with you, I just need a little commitment from you,
    Whenever you are ready, You will sell off your business, house, and entire property
    Give the income out to orphanages, you relocate back here
    In this very mansion, we will both live and grow, We will raise our kids here, live our lives together here.
    At this point my Dad shouted, WHAT?
    Me: Yes dad, that’s how this is going to work
    Remember this is my house too, and you don’t want me going off again
    This way I can see you every day and you can learn to like Clyde as well
    He didn’t say anything, I heard my mum say she is right, just then Clyde stood up
    Clyde: Babs, how do you expect me to sell off everything I have?
    I can’t do that, how do I provide for you and staying in this house is like prison,
    Babs please, is that the reason why you didn’t want me buying the apartment? If we are going to start our lives together not in here, where your dad here hates me
    Me: Watch it Clyde so you don’t insult my dad
    I want you but I can’t go back to a house that holds a lot of memories.
    A place where I can’t tell what you might do next
    In this house, I have hope you wouldn’t try anything funny
    Because I am ready to provide everything, I will work now and you stay at home
    I don’t want the case you go out and I keep looking over my shoulders
    Clyde: So this is more like keeping tabs on me
    Is my word not enough, I love you Babs, nothing can change that
    Don’t cage that Babs.
    Me: if you love me as you said, you wouldn’t have a problem with this arrangements.
    You said you want to be with me, you have the opportunity to do that now
    Nothing is stopping you now, not my Dad not my friends
    Clyde: thank you Babs, you have finally achieved your purpose of hurting me.
    He then walked out on us,
    I knew what I planned on doing will hurt him a lot
    Especially selling off his property and becoming a nobody in my dad’s house, somehow I just wanted to see how far he is willing to go for me.
    But I also know I want this for myself, Am too scared to commit now.
    After he left, my mum shouted, Wow and my Dad what a relief, i just walked to my room and laid on the bed.
    This time the tears refused to come, until I slept off the next day and a day followed, he wasn’t just answering the call
    Mum said I should give him space, he needs time to process, I went about my duties, work, and outings with my family,the friends I left behind, from one conference to another
    It seemed like I have completely forgotten Clyde existed
    But a part of me is fully aware he might show up, I begin to feel regrets for what am about to do
    I don’t know for how long I planned on treating him that way but that’s just how it has to be, I don’t see myself married again
    To get tied again with some metal called “RING” I want to be free, I want a normal life
    Nothing like before, it’s not like I would disrespect my husband
    But I just want to be secured, because I already feel insecure Clyde has been in London getting to 6months now
    Just to win me back, if am so important to him
    He will be back for me, i can’t tell how long
    It’s been a month already since I told him to sell off everything
    And he flee like a coward, such a kid
    I managed to insult

    EPISODE 41

    “Commitment is like the tree on which the fruit grows, if you can’t don’t attempt”

    I just finished doing some laundry, I insist on doing my own laundries
    I got used to the African lifestyle during my Nigerian times
    Since I got back the washing machine could rest
    Was busy chewing on something when the bell rang
    Opening the door, I saw Clyde standing there like he hasn’t slept in days
    Clyde: Can I come in
    Me: ermm yeah sure, i walked with him to where I was sitting earlier
    I was stealing glances, checking him out
    We sat for a while until he asked the whereabouts of my parents
    Since they were not around, he just had to tell me what he came for
    Clyde: So I will go straight to the point
    If you will still have me, am ready to do this now
    This house though am not sure, but I think you are right
    Who would want to be with me after the harm I have caused
    By the way I brought my things from the hotel
    Is it okay if i move in now?
    I mean if am going to spend my life in here, I must as well start right away
    Babs say something, is this not what you want
    Or have I said something wrong again?
    I finally found my voice, I didn’t think he would do it, I admire him now more for this i was tempted to just take everything I said back,
    But there is my family,
    I mean this my decision is also about them, More about my own fears, and my insecure state than forgiving him
    Me: Clyde I didn’t think you would even consider it
    Ermm come let me help you with the bags, then we can talk
    After what looks like 10 minutes, we were done
    He didn’t bring a lot of things so it was quick, Am yet to make space for his stuffs
    We sat on the bed opposite each other
    With my hands hanging on my cheeks as if i was in a trance i listened to him as he spoke
    Clyde: Am here now, what? And one more thing I wasn’t able to finalize selling of the business
    How are we going to go about that?
    Me: You know that’s a requirement for this to work
    But thats fine, so far as it gets done
    Am sorry too for doing this by the way
    Clyde: I understand you can’t trust me now
    And so sorry for walking out on your family, I love you Babs,
    Nothing will change that not even your Dad, He then came closer, held me in a tight hug I couldn’t help but let the tears flow

    Clyde: Its’ okay, we are going to be fine
    In the evening we finally had that talk with my Dad,
    Which from every indication shows he has no plans of giving up

    I understand him sometimes; when you think you are impotent and out of the blues after 9 good years you are blessed with a beautiful girl, you would want to be over protective

    Throughout the conversation, he made small talks

    Like; so far as you are happy, i will be watching closely
    He better not do anything Funny
    Who would have thought, I would be sleeping on the same bed with Clyde
    We have been sleeping on the same bed every now and then, sometimes I take the couch
    During the day I go to work, whiles he stays home
    Once I make sure he has food to eat,
    He likes my meals so no laziness this time
    He tells me he stays in doors, which is beginning to be boring, He can’t stand my dad’s attitude,
    mum however has been helpful

    EPISODE 42

    “Don’t over make the rules in your home, keep them simple for peace sake”

    Clyde takes the time to help my brothers out with assignments
    Their football games i can’t keep up with
    And it’s nice to get home and be greeted by your husband with a kiss
    Though it was supposed to be the other way round
    It’s been 3weeks and he hasn’t touched me yet and am gradually burning inside, pride on his side
    On my side am sure it’s just fear of what I should expect
    It’s been long, yes i know that but I sure have no expectations, I’m beginning to think he is paying me back for this arrangement
    I mean am I the bad one here, I love this man so much
    And he hurt me pretty bad, now am not sure what I have ahead of me, I was talking to myself silently when he came in from a run
    I was just staring at him, as if there is something different about him

    Clyde: Why, what’s going on i just went for a run
    Me: Yeah I know, Is it now a crime to admire you

    Clyde: No, but I just have a feeling that’s just not it
    Me: Clyde am fine, I just have something I want to ask you
    You okay right, everything is fine between us?
    I hope whatever we have going on here isn’t affecting us, You are not angry over anything right?
    The tears started flowing.
    Clyde: Hey Babs, are you okay
    What is it, has someone done something to you
    He came closer and i just zoomed on his lips like I was hungry
    I could see him struggling to let go, when I was busy pulling off his shorts
    As if he knew I wasn’t going to stop, he pulled away by force
    Leaving me on the bed, then he was walking around the room with his hand scratching his head
    Me: What is it, Are you punishing me for something
    You haven’t touched me in 3weeks, what kind of emotional trauma is this
    Clyde: It’s not like that, I want to Babs, trust me, But I just can’t,
    Me: What are you afraid of? Me?
    Were you not the same person some months back you were so eager to sleep with me if I had let go
    He wasn’t saying anything anymore, so I just walked out which he tried to stop me

    EPISODE 43

    “Let it in, whatever feelings you have, explore it, and don’t let it go”

    I didn’t plan going out that afternoon, but I drove to work
    Finished up some paper work, when I got home, He had already eaten, courtesy my mum
    I just answered; Fine, Took my bath and went straight to bed, while he was busy with some papers
    I couldn’t tell when he came to bed, but I was awoken by his hands running all over me i relaxed for some time and turned around facing him
    Clyde: sorry about this morning, I have a reason for that
    Promise you won’t get mad or associate that to my past

    Me: Okay, which is what. Talk am listening
    Clyde: Just look down,
    Me: what should I be looking at?
    Clyde: Babs don’t tell me you can’t see what’s going on here
    Me: Clyde, just speak up, I‘m not really in the mood to guess now
    Clyde: See, I can’t get it up Babs,
    He pointed down to his pajamas
    Me: Is that it?
    Okay can I sleep now please
    Clyde: Is that what you have to say, I thought you were complaining earlier
    Me: What should I say? You call me at this time of the night, just to tell me you can’t get it up
    When you haven’t even tried yet, and you expect me to be happy about it?

    Clyde: Babs look at me, am not lieing, you know me when am lieing
    Me: Well am not sure if I know you anymore
    Clyde: Please am not lieing,

    EPISODE 44

    “The past will always pop up after a makeup, you sure have to make plans to deal with it, it doesn’t go away too easily ”

    This was the main reason I couldn’t sleep with those girls back in Nigeria
    Me: Ooh so you are implying you would have if it were the opposite
    Clyde: I didn’t say that, please if we are going to make this relationship work, You have to at least give me the benefit of the doubt sometimes
    Am here now, I did exactly as you want, and I said I love you, What proof do you need again, Please Babs
    Me: As if you gave me any, I said silently
    Okay, what do you want me to do?
    No the question is, was this before you decided to sleep out or when.
    Clyde: Do we have to go into this again please?
    Me: I thought you wanted solutions to your problem down there
    Then answer my questions
    Clyde: I hope this doesn’t change anything between us
    You remember those early mornings I get angry unnecessarily, it was because I couldn’t get it off sometimes, I had to force myself which you end up sleeping early
    Me: Yes I remember, you always blame me for sleeping early, You knew this and you still blamed me
    Why didn’t you talk to me, am beginning to think the girls were to test your theory
    Which failed and would have made your so called revenge then successful
    Is the fault from me or you?

    No wonder you said am not good in bed, meaning am the problem

    Was I not attractive enough, what wasn’t I doing right

    Clyde: Babs until when will you stop bringing this up, I guess my whole life,
    I just have to get used to it
    This doesn’t make me love you the least

    But maybe if I don’t have to stay in the same house with your Dad, I would have tried a lot harder

    Me: What is that supposed to mean
    Is my Dad holding your manhood?

    Were you not the one who decided to enter every w---e you see

    Clyde: Babs sorry, I didn’t mean it that way

    And I didn’t sleep with any w---e, not after we got married

    I only kept it a secret because I didn’t want you to worry

    Me: It does get me worried, when you keep such things from me

    Clyde: But am telling you now, I want to be with you
    But we will need time, if you are up for it I will be glad

    I finally calmed down after some few talks here and there
    Me: Let’s talk tomorrow I then tried to sleep, but was awake watching him sleep all-night

    I thought of peeping to see what he was actually referring to as I didn’t take a look earlier

    No wonder,
    Since Clyde moved in
    We only go beyond his belly

    He has become so protective of touching him down there

    No doubt, he sleeps like a prince

    I remember the first week after he moved in
    He either takes his bath when am not around or when am fast asleep

    But this doesn’t call for hidding his body from me

    Unless there’s something else he is not telling me

    If I were him, I wouldn’t even try keeping another secret

    I thought to myself

    I love this prince
    I will definitely forgive him one day
    Until that happens, let me try and give him my support
    Since then we try so many times in a day.

    EPISODE 45 (Final)

    “Forgiveness opens doors, forgive and most importantly forgive yourself first”

    I took some time off to be home
    My dad nevertheless complains of our late nights or when we end up not coming home at all
    I guess he is getting used to the trend
    We decided the arguments and fights are enough
    Gradually my heart begins to open up again to forgive him
    But these past month it was more about forgiving myself than forgiving him

    I realized when he hurt me, I needed to forgive myself for the guilt i feel
    The many things i thought if i had done right then we wouldn’t be in this situation.
    i was beginning to feel sorry for him staying home all day, after months of our reunion
    We only go out when I want us to, and end up paying the bills
    He feels embarrassed sometimes but can’t complain
    He neither touches the allowance i give him
    Once he told me he wants to take me out, but had less than what I deserve
    I asked to give him money but then he turned it down claiming that wouldn’t be romantic anymore
    He said I should take it like, starting his life afresh
    I asked him to sell off his property, not clear his savings as well
    Apparently he had cleared before coming here
    And made some pretty much risky investments while leaving
    After a week, I was at work when he called telling me he wasn’t feeling well.
    I rushed home just to find him all dressed up for a date he booked without my help,
    I asked where he got the money from since he hasn’t touched what I left
    He wasn’t going to tell me, I just gave up
    But I heard from my brothers he did some heavy lifting for my mum
    He offered to do that when my mum was going to hire someone.
    She refused but he said he can do it for a fee then
    Knowing my mum, she might have been more than generous
    I did enjoy our date, it felt so good to be pampered outside the house
    Me: Darling, can I suggest something and don’t say, No
    Clyde: Anything for you Babs
    Me: I want you to think of working again I will give you the Capital, and don’t say No
    Clyde: What happened, am I too much of a burden, Besides I hardly buy anything
    Me: Please that’s not it, I feel I made that decision in a haste

    And I have no right to rob you of whatever you worked for
    Am willing to pay all that back
    Clyde: Babs thank you, but I won’t need your money
    If you want me to work, then I will
    But kindly let me do this on my own.
    I will get a job, save and get something set up so I can have time for you.
    Me: Then let me recruit you
    My dad’s company is huge enough, we can always create a position for you
    Clyde: I don’t want you having any further problems with your Dad, I will find something, just give me sometime dear
    ME: Am not rushing you, but promise me you will ask for help, if you need it, one thing led to another, all I remembered was we were holding hands talking
    By the time we realized the deed has been done and we were panting
    With me yelling out I love you, like our first night ever today
    Where I had him all to myself, and took him out of this world
    He only smiled and said finally you said it again Which he replies I love to hear you say that again
    I could feel my body drenched in sweat, when the air-con is still on
    You can tell that was a really good one
    We had other fierce rounds until evening, That was the breakthrough, we didn’t need any extra therapy to get to work
    Since then we never had a problem with our sexual life

    My dad on the other hand keeps looking for our trouble, crushing our moments

    I remember him telling Clyde he should keep his shorts zipped , and that his company is not a brothel

    I don’t know where he got that from, Clyde is beginning to think he had cameras installed in my office because there is no way he would have known about our office romance

    Well that’s his problem

    Up till now Clyde is still looking for a job
    He has refused help, but am determined to help without his knowledge.
    My Dad however cannot stand the fact that I spend most of my times with Clyde.
    I remember he once walked in on us in the act, wrapped under the sheets though
    Which he shouted young man close the d--n door next time, Before you defile my daughter under my own roof, or Do you need lectures
    I replied Dad knock next time, we are two consenting adults
    So am sure the law allows that and he sure knows what he is doing

    Clyde couldn’t help but laugh after he left I admit I have been giving my dad some attitude lately
    But I just want him to agree with me regarding my husband being part of the family now
    I refer to him by my husband because there is no other way I can call what we have now
    Mum on the other hand has been so helpful, she wants to be the best mother in-law
    After one early morning quickie before work, that has become the trend now I can’t resist too,
    I mean I enjoy every bit of it, it gets me fired up for work
    Clyde not knowing bought a ring to be placed on my finger
    I told him No, that I love what we have now
    We wrote our vow in just one single statement and signed; Love should never elude us again.
    After a few thoughts I took the ring, hang it on our bedroom wall together with the vow.
    Which I hope I could re-consider and put on someday
    May be when my Dad starts being nice to my partner

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